Alcohol, Drunk DIY Don't drink and DIY

Don't drink and DIY

bob the builders pissed off daughter - 29/12/2015 23:52 - United States - Campbell

Today, my dad got drunk and decided to fix everything in the house he thought was broken. Now the oven won't cook, half the floorboards from the stairs are piled in the garden, we put the TV back together but now it is stuck on mute, and we still have no idea where he has put my bedroom door. FML

22 068

1 411

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

mazzer - 04/01/2012 02:04 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad had a day off and was 'bored' so he decided to move our entire kitchen into our living room. We now have no running water, no oven that works and the entire house is a bombsite. He has an entire week off. FML

27 064

2 271

Perfectionist

Anonymous - 23/02/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, we finished redecorating my kitchen. My dad has been his usual OCD self about getting it perfect, so when he noticed a shelf was just barely not level, he decided to adjust the screws. It fell off and damaged my floor, so he threw the screwdriver and cracked a wall tile. Thanks dad. FML

517

Drunken antics

DevilsTemptation - 29/08/2019 02:01 - United Kingdom - Dundee

Today, my dad got extremely drunk, so I took away his car keys and left on foot. When I came back, I saw that he had broken down my door. Now my dad is mad at me for not giving him the keys when he was drunk, and I'm door-less. FML

1 807

172

DIY nightmare

Anonymous - 20/04/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad uttered the dreaded words, “Now don’t worry boy, I knows exactly what I is doing.” A few short minutes later he has a destroyed impact drill, my ladder is snapped, my kitchen window is broken, my wife is in hospital for stitches, and we can’t find the cat. FML

561

114

Anger management

FML - 08/12/2013 18:00 - Puerto Rico - Cayey

Today, my dad came home drunk off his ass. So drunk that he couldn't manage to open the refrigerator, and ended up punching it in a fit of rage. When I tried to calm him down and get him to bed, he told me to fuck off, and grounded me. FML

40 690

3 400

Saved

Harry - 05/12/2009 05:29 - United States

Today, my dad decided to get his friend to help move our old sofa to save money. Its leg got stuck in the doorway, scratched the entire hallway wall, punched a big hole in it, and the other leg made a big dent in our front door. We live in an apartment complex and now have to to pay for everything to be fixed. FML

25 258

6 254

Boom!

Anonymous - 03/10/2019 12:00 - United Kingdom - Wigan

Today, my dad stumbled home drunk at closing time and woke the whole house with a bang by attempting to heat a tin of baked beans in the microwave, without removing the beans from the tin first. FML

1 600

114

francesa_loca - 14/10/2011 16:09 - Canada

Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML

32 987

2 530

Todd - 14/08/2012 16:14 - United States

Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML

23 830

1 982

Singlewife - 23/03/2019 22:00

Today my husband got drunk and wrecked the house. And when I say wrecked the house, I mean ripping everything off book shelves, Tearing the ceiling fan out of the wall, Opening the fridge and shoveling everything out. Glass everywhere. etc. and this isn’t the first time. I clean up every time. FML

2 397

1 612

Warmonger_Smurf 29

Wednesday 30 December 2015 9:56

For being drunk he got a shit ton done. That sounds like a couple of months of work for a sober dad.

Liamj774 36

Wednesday 30 December 2015 9:41

With any luck he may have buried your door in the garden or in the stove

TripleDallas123 15

Friday 1 January 2016 4:08

Have you tried turning then off and back on again?

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 2 January 2016 3:50

And where were you during all this? if you were there, YDI for not preventing it from happening. If you were also drunk, you both deserve it.

rockbandaddict85 22

Saturday 2 January 2016 5:25

Bob the builder?! ...More like wreck it ralph!!

f16poom 20

Thursday 21 January 2016 8:06

OP, "bob the builder's pissed off daughter" only made this post even that much more funny. I don't know why I laughed my insides out for it, but thanks for the laugh!