Cats, Scary and Kids: Beware!

Beware!

By Anonymous - 24/11/2011 17:07 - United States

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 129

You deserved it 3 836

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 22:36 - United States

Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 276

You deserved it 7 320

By Anonymous - 11/01/2012 20:08 - United Arab Emirates

Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 371

You deserved it 7 503

By grosssss - 01/01/2010 13:03 - Australia

Today, while I was trying to get to sleep, I heard a strange noise coming from the bunk bed above mine. I looked up to see what it was and my cat vomited over the edge, onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 744

You deserved it 3 438

By Uh oh.... - 05/05/2019 16:00

Today, I was awakened by a small scary dark figure approaching me while making creepy noises. I screamed, kicked it away, and buried my face under my pillow. Later, after braving up, I turned on the lights. It was my sick 3-year-old niece, now dazed and coughing blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 104

You deserved it 2 835

Freaked out

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my son was crying and refusing to sleep in his room because a spider ran along the wall, and it's now hiding somewhere. He’s 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 019

You deserved it 543

By ambushcat - 06/07/2012 03:31 - United States

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 524

You deserved it 28 656

Rocky VIX

By Anonymous - 29/09/2019 20:06

Today, I was laying with my face dangling down the side of my bed, when my kitten rushed up to me looking worried. He sniffed me for a while, then decided the best thing to do was to stand on his hind legs and start punching my face like a speed bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 370

You deserved it 366

By ENDmySUFFERING - 21/07/2016 15:25 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, I walked into my son's room only to be attacked by a swarm of flies. I'm afraid to go back in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 274

You deserved it 1 298

By Michelle - 20/02/2011 17:45 - United States

Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 119

You deserved it 4 977

Scooby snacks

By Anonymous - 04/07/2022 07:00 - United States - Ashland

Today, I was frantically woken up from a nap by my son who was scared because there was a dog in the house. We don't own a dog. It was the new neighbor's dog. When my son opened the door to go play outside, the dog came barreling in. My kid and cats were terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 148

Checker 20

Friday 25 November 2011 0:53

Check again...?

irimalovecheer98 5

Friday 25 November 2011 0:55

Lol, I feel bad for your son

Comments

simsimma88 0

Friday 25 November 2011 2:08

That's just unlucky... Lol

jayejayejaye122 3

Friday 25 November 2011 2:33

Well well well, look who it was

Zimmington 21

Friday 25 November 2011 2:42

Beware the Pussy Cat

boardforlife 0

Friday 25 November 2011 2:43

Get the ****** cat declawed

HatefulPilot 0

Friday 25 November 2011 3:25

You get declawed.

UlybkaVoron 6

Friday 25 November 2011 4:20

Do boards have claws? Maybe he should sand himself. He's just mad the cat used him as a scratch post.

Isoldael 27

Friday 25 November 2011 10:31

Declawing cats is just inhumane :(.

Llama_Face89 33

Saturday 26 November 2011 12:04

It's also something you can only do before they're a certain age. Some time when they're kittens.

sandra5897 0

Friday 25 November 2011 2:47

Get ready for him to sleep w you for the next couple of weeks!

thethatoneguy_21 4

Friday 25 November 2011 3:05

Proving once again that cats are the spawn of Satan

mrnieto1894 0

Friday 25 November 2011 3:19

Kick that cat out of the house. Cats suck

monster_tamer 11

Friday 25 November 2011 3:52

I'll have you know that cats are awesome, and you must merely be insanely jealous of their pwnage.

JinxosGirl87 0

Friday 25 November 2011 3:39

The cat must have found the monster and wanted to get the hell outta there!

Muffin_boo 12

Friday 25 November 2011 3:40

LOLOLOL. Poor you, poor cat, and poor son!

toricakes 7

Friday 25 November 2011 5:29

Lmao aaawww!

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I agree, your life sucks 19 342

You deserved it 3 622

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I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 95

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I agree, your life sucks 47 534

You deserved it 3 264

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I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 32

Today, my wheelchair was delivered. My brother and I were messing around with it when he rolled over my already injured foot. At least surgery is next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 993

You deserved it 3 059

Today, while I was leaving the grocery store, I realized my ignition key was missing from my pocket. After searching the car and retracing my steps, I walked all the way home. Later, when we went to retrieve the car, the key was sitting in plain sight on the passenger seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 607

You deserved it 22 926