Bananarama By wtfisthisworldcomingto - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff Today, I was mugged. The guy mugging me was eating a banana. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 882 You deserved it 7 510 Share Tweet Share
Today, a kid walked in on me and my new FWB having sex at her place. I knew she had children, so I asked if it was hers. No, it was her son's. I'm boning a grandma who's not even 50. FML I agree, your life sucks 134 You deserved it 454
Today, I was let go from my balloon-selling job at the zoo. They put a new monkey cage in my designated spot. I was literally fired so a monkey could take my place. FML I agree, your life sucks 40 068 You deserved it 5 086
Today, it's been two years since my husband promised improvements if I stayed. He abided and we're good, despite a counselor insisting it was mere narcissistic manipulation, without ever meeting him. Did I mention she also claimed it would be "empowering" for me to leave, and set "a good example" on our kids? FML I agree, your life sucks 519 You deserved it 219
Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. She pulls out a freezer bag full of condoms and says "I have some cooler ones upstairs, if you want his penis to glow in the dark." FML I agree, your life sucks 29 916 You deserved it 4 613
Today, I started my first teaching job ever. As I was teaching, another teacher interrupted my class about 5 times because she thought it was her class. Not only did she ruin my confidence, her behavior caused my students to laugh at me. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 679 You deserved it 2 975
Today, I found out I will not be moving back to California. My mom told me we were going to go on a 2 month vacation to see family in India. She decided we are staying for good. FML I agree, your life sucks 5 261 You deserved it 300
did he stab you with the banana?
That's important information. Tell the cops to search for banana breath.