Health, Mental health, Anxiety, ACAB Cops Am I being detained? - FML

Am I being detained?

PackingSpaceHeat - - United States

Today, I realized I've been acting very paranoid lately. I was mugged a few weeks ago, so I've been nervous. I've been holding my hands in my pockets and looking around on my way outside from work. Apparently, that's grounds to arrest someone under suspicion of carrying a concealed weapon. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Jonas - 06/06/2012 05:00 - United States - Wimberley

Today, I realized my paranoia is really bad when I saw my coworker holding a knife and immediately began thinking of ways to keep him from stabbing me. I work in a restaurant kitchen. FML

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Angrily Paranoid - 06/10/2013 05:29 - United States - Seattle

Today, my paranoia got so bad that I had to physically restrain myself from aggressively confronting the kid walking behind me on the sidewalk. FML

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Freaked out

AnxietyGirl - 24/09/2012 07:18 - United States - Parker

Today, I had to admit that I desperately need anti-anxiety medication. Apparently, when you walk around a grocery store avoiding eye contact and generally acting "sketchy", management will call the police on you, who will then pat you down to be sure you aren't shoplifting. FML

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lalala - 14/06/2011 10:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was arrested for carrying a dangerous weapon. I was on my way home from the shop where I'd bought a new kitchen knife. FML

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No one is safe

chili - 24/07/2021 04:01

Today, I got mugged at work. The sad thing is I'm a cop and was trying to catch the people who mugged me previously while off duty. FML

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Bunch of bankers

Anonymous - 03/11/2009 19:49 - United States

Today, I got stopped at the bank by security for carrying a weapon and threatened to call the police. I had to prove my “metal stick” was not a weapon. I'm partially paralyzed in one of my feet and have to walk with a cane. FML

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Anonymous - 25/11/2014 20:15 - United States

Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML

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Anonymous - 14/02/2013 00:00 - Canada - Coquitlam

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

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THATguy - 21/09/2009 04:12 - United States

Today, I was at work when two sheriff's deputies walked in. They asked me my name and when I told them, they asked me to turn around and they cuffed me. They told me I was under arrest for robbery. Turns out I was mistakenly IDed, but now every one at my job thinks I'm an armed robber. FML

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lamed - 04/12/2009 22:01 - United States

Today, I stopped by the gun store to pick up a new concealed weapon for protection. As I was leaving the store, a man came up behind me, hit me with a crowbar, and stole my gun. FML

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Jizzylol 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:20

is that a concealed weapon or are you just glad to see me?

lendmeyourteeth 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:18

hah so, you didn't have a weapon so nothing serious went down

Butcher_1419 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 23:05

to 17: then don't ****** call us anymore

sodahhhr 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 23:06

Good thing I live in a gated community with no... well, you know the rest

El_mariachi 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 23:12

#17 kill yourself

aero_fml 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 23:12

Intelligent, respectable people?

mysuckishlife 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 23:23

YDI for being American

expawn 0

Monday 12 October 2009 0:09

That's what you get for living in ****** ass NY! Move somewhere else, were they have actually heard of the 2nd amendment.

lahp 0

Monday 12 October 2009 0:25

yes a weapon ... or touching your self

stain33319 0

Monday 12 October 2009 0:55

15 is a piece of shit racist

CheshireHalli 19

Monday 12 October 2009 1:46

He's a POS anyway. -.-

katrinaa_13 0

Monday 12 October 2009 2:00

ROFLMFAOOOOOO. :)

SS_Anon 0

Monday 12 October 2009 2:35

hmm i don't even know what to say, FYL OP but also remember that some cops aren't assholes

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

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Today, I received the contract for the new job I'm supposed to start in two weeks. It says I need an official document from the public health department, which I have to present on the first day on the job. The first available appointment to get said document is in four weeks. FML

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Today, my dad sent me back and forth repeatedly to the auto parts store for a replacement headlight bulb. He kept insisting that what I brought back was the wrong bulb. I had to drag him there to show I was getting the right one by asking the clerk. He's wrong, but is mad at me for embarrassing him in front of the staff. FML

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Today, I so obviously dozed off during a video call at work. Afterwards, my manager messaged me asking if I was OK. I was mortified, and now I'm "on his watch." FML

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Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said, "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML

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Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML

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