Gift ideas By EmmaG123 - 28/02/2009 05:54 - United States Today, I sent my mom an email with "Bad news" as the subject. At the end of her reply, she said, "And don't scare me! I thought you were going to tell me you're pregnant!" I AM pregnant, and wanted to surprise her on her birthday. Guess I should get her something less disappointing. FML I agree, your life sucks 56 144 You deserved it 5 137 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML I agree, your life sucks 35 574 You deserved it 10 439
Today, my parents staged a family intervention and gave me the grandest bollocking I've ever experienced in all my 22 years of life. They did this because my sister showed them a photo of me jokingly posing with three bottles of Bud Light at a party. Apparently, I'm an alcoholic in denial. FML I agree, your life sucks 29 109 You deserved it 4 967
Today, I discovered I have bed bugs. I have nowhere else to sleep and I won't be able to afford a new mattress for at least a year. I'd better get used to these giant welts. FML I agree, your life sucks 32 337 You deserved it 5 351
Today, my girlfriend left me for my sister. I can't stop thinking about all those days they went out alone for "girl time." FML I agree, your life sucks 49 676 You deserved it 3 879
Today, I woke up and found that someone had taken a dump on my car. They'd apparently felt bad about it, as they'd then keyed "sorry" into the door. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 946 You deserved it 2 445
Today, my wife asked for a divorce. Apparently, me being forced to work on her birthday and our anniversary 3 years in a row is the absolute limit she’s willing to put up with. FML I agree, your life sucks 607 You deserved it 910