By Gottalovepeople - 31/12/2017 01:34
The Top
By mermaidkeels - 18/06/2016 08:51 - United States
By paid to scoop ice cream not nana-sit - 17/06/2016 03:13 - United States - Fall River
By Lostring - 02/07/2018 20:30
By HomeAlone - 24/04/2016 04:45 - United States
By Sady_Ct - 17/11/2018 19:07 - Australia
Sady_Ct tells us more.
By rattledwife666 - 21/01/2017 14:00
Tasty
By anon - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States
Violence is rarely the answer
By anon - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Spencer
Slice of life
By Eleanor - 19/02/2017 23:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds
Hello there
By My eyes were on the prize - 12/03/2017 00:00
By Emmereen - 23/03/2017 15:20
Emmereen tells us more.
OP here. My cat was not hurt, thankfully. He briefly looked a bit shaken, and then felt the need to be underfoot while I cleaned up the glass. He's made that jump before and since, though nowadays a tall cat tree seems to satisfy his desire to launch himself to great heights.
When your body can't handle your skills
By Lewis - 01/02/2019 00:30 - France - Paris
By franska - 03/11/2015 00:14 - Suède - Lund
By anon. - 17/11/2015 18:34 - United Kingdom - London
By Nuts - 07/11/2015 02:55 - Canada - Grimsby
By Porkletmon - 25/12/2016 20:49 - United States - Philadelphia
Porkletmon tells us more.
OP here. I didn't create an account because I didn't think this would get posted. Thanks for making my day! I just wanted to clarify some things, especially about the olive oil and vinegar gift set. The father is Italian and appreciates a good bottle of vinegar and oil, I'm not talking about the regular kinds you can get at the supermarket, but olive oil that is cold pressed and infused with rosemary herbs, the vinegar is infused with dark espresso and they both gushed about it. Now, about the soap, it is not "fancy" or thoughtful, it was a square bar of soap (think Dial) in a Ziplock bag, the soap had no wrappings. Had I not notice the foul odor coming from the armpit area of the dress, I would have agreed that the dress probably just absorbed some of the smell from her house, but in this case, I highly doubt it. Also, the dress tag was put in through a thread loop, not through the fabrics, and the tag was already yellowed with stains. The Coach leather bag itself had a strong leather smell, but what I smelled was something resembling sweaty feet, the purse had dried white stains on it and parts of the leather was scratched up. Needless to say, you won't see me wearing any of those things on New Years Eve. Happy Holidays everyone!
Leaking
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States
By Ted - 06/06/2019 18:00
By workworkwork - 27/05/2017 20:00
Superficial
By toolateabuckshort - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
Monday Morning Blues
By Anonymous - 01/07/2019 14:00
By JackNicholsonInChinatown - 25/10/2016 02:58
By mercumorr - 17/09/2016 12:27 - United States - Philadelphia
mercumorr tells us more.
OP here! It was in no way meant as harassment and definitely wasn't a serious question towards anyone! And no, it's not a sex shop! We manufacture eye wear :) For those asking for the weirder things: 1. A 36 year old man asked me out twice 2. The same man has been fired and escorted out by police for parole violations (convicted of owning/distributing child **** a few years ago, if you're interested) 3. An old woman has bent a young black man over a table and spanked him with a ruler 4. Found out that the nice, grandfatherly old man actually says creepy sexual things about the young girls he finds attractive. My favorite being, "I need some bubble wrap to hide my woody" 5. Gotten asked if I wear my beanie during sex because no one has seen me without my hat since my first day 6. Found a LARGE clump of pubic hair in a bathroom stall. Someone was actually trimming their pubes at work. 7. Recently had the bathrooms soundproofed because you could hear people having violent diarrhea from the conference rooms right next door. Guess it ruined the CEOs' catered meetings a little too often. 7. Heard a mentally challenged man frequently discuss popping his blow up dolls, **** preferences, and how he sometimes gets the urge to ********** in the bathroom. Still employed with us, but thankfully got transferred downstairs to the lab. 8. Heard a couple guys make sexual comments about the woman who delivers the mail to each department, not knowing that she is actually my mother 10. A guy came in on heroine and took dick pics on the elevator. While someone was right next to him. I left quite a few out to keep this from going on too long, but there's some of my favorites. I find most of these things pretty funny and I don't wanna be the reason anyone loses their job, so I don't plan on reporting anything!
Fight! Fight!
By LostInSunday - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff
By Hey, thats not math!? - 09/08/2016 20:20 - United States - Sunnyside
Stoooooop!
By emancipate my ass - 24/07/2016 04:02
By Noname - 12/03/2009 22:08 - United States
By Katsura - 19/07/2016 00:43 - United States - Perrysburg
By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 09:34 - Canada - Winnipeg
Keywords
I do know what an audio book is. I thought I clicked on the ebook and only after I went to open it did I realise it wasn’t an Ebook but an audio book. They didn’t have the same title in the ebook. I got a refund after a couple of days.