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Directions

By Anonymous - 26/04/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I had a hard time directing my dad to where we were supposed to throw out our broken toilets when we replaced them with new ones. I kept saying to go to the right. Unfortunately I was talking about MY right, not HIS right, and he was walking backwards. It wasn't until I said "other way" that he got it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86

You deserved it 403

More fiber

By Anonymous - 27/04/2026 22:00 - Canada - Burlington

Today, after several years of effort in fixing my diet, I finally have consistent, reliable, solid shits, this coming after many decades of loose stools that caused my to clog my toilets regularly with too much toilet paper. Only now, my consistent, reliable, solid shits clog my toilets instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 96

No contest

By Anonymous - 17/05/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I'm sick of my wife’s attitude. Apparently, when she has the kids by herself it’s "parenting", but when I have the kids it’s “babysitting” or “helping out” or my new favourite “the least you can do, you lazy asshole.” When added up, I parent the kids by myself more hours than she does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 72

The economy is doing great

By Anonymous - 26/05/2026 09:00 - United States - Boston

Today, during a work happy hour, someone complained about “people who still live with their parents after 25.” I laughed along before remembering I had taken the train there from my parents’ house because my landlord raised my rent again. To make it worse, the guy at the table later asked if anyone could spot him money for a taxi home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 222

Do not attempt this at home

By Poopy - 02/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was constipated and so desperate to go that I ate an entire box of laxatives. Now I'm in the hospital on a saline drip for dehydration and malnutrition, in addition to getting a massive enema and having the most agonizing shit of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 493

I wanna go home

By "Anonymous survey" my ass - 04/06/2026 12:00 - Brazil - Itajaí

Today, I got written up at work. Apparently, "Going fully remote" is not an answer to "How can we be more sustainable at work and help save the planet?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 390

You deserved it 78

Recruitment hell

By Unemployedloser - 08/06/2026 00:00 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I had a job interview and the interviewer assumed that since I'm short, I wouldn't be able to take the garbage out. Yesterday I had another interviewer call me a loser for being a stay-at-home mom. I'm gonna be unemployed forever it seems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 75

Clifford lives

By Anonymous - 25/06/2026 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was transferring video from my camera to my laptop so I could start editing my film project. My wife’s badly behaved dog decided to barrel through my office, knocking everything over. Screen shattered, camera broken, video files corrupted due to the cable coming out mid-transfer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 105

Stolen valor

By running girl - 29/06/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I was signed up for a local 10K run after months of saying I'd "get back into running." Everything went well until I crossed the finish line and proudly accepted a medal… that belonged to someone standing behind me. She had to tap on my shoulder and ask for it back while other runners and volunteers smirked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 272

You deserved it 149

Poopy

By Dead - 30/06/2026 22:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my girlfriend had an "accident" at home. She texted me about it. I tried to lightly tease her and sent a comment about her shitting her pants… to the family group chat by mistake. I'm currently writing my last will and testament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 572

Influencers out here causing mayhem

By Anonymous - 04/07/2026 09:00 - United States - Chino

Today, at the gym, I politely asked these wannabe influencers to stop recording with me squarely in frame. They laughed and continued. I got angry and nastily told them off, before calling management. Somehow I’m the bad guy here and earned the nickname “Kareniqua.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 90

I think you should leave

By Anonymous - 11/07/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, one of my employees lied to his mother and told her that I’m his girlfriend, so she actually came to invite me to Sunday dinner. Nice woman, but I had to tell her he lied, since I’m married, to my wife. She kicked up a huge stink in the shop and accused me of using her son for "hetero sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 426

You deserved it 64

Settler setters

By Anonymous - 15/07/2026 00:00 - United States - Lady Lake

Today, my dogs have coordinated a T-formation as I lay down to sleep. Essentially cutting me off 80% of the bed. Too tired to fight, too annoyed to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 124

You deserved it 321

Grow up

By Michelle - 18/07/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my 21 year-old daughter called crying because she was in pain due to a wisdom tooth. She was angry because she thinks I should have called the dentist for her. She can't get an appointment immediately, so now refuses to celebrate her birthday four weeks away. I told her that she's an adult now. Still my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 145

Time comes for everyone

By So old - 22/07/2026 03:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, my favorite band from my teenage years was played on an oldies station on the car radio. To make matters worse, my sixteen year-old niece who was in the car, had never heard of them. I’m only 31, but damn, I feel old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 136

Thanks!

By Anonymous - 01/08/2026 20:00 - Germany

I agree, your life sucks 292

You deserved it 69

Lost in film

By bad movie - 05/08/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I got to the movie theater early to avoid missing the previews. I sat through 20 minutes of trailers before realizing I was in the wrong auditorium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 358

Shifting the blame

By Anonymous - 19/08/2026 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, at work, I gave ice cream to a kid and apple pie to his dad. The kid decided to grab a literal handful of the dad’s pie which was steaming hot. Cue the kid screaming and the dad yelling at me for not telling his kid that the dessert, that WASN'T HIS, was hot and he shouldn’t touch it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 46

Busted

By Anonymous - 21/08/2026 09:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, at 6 a.m., the cops burst into our home. My husband was slammed to the ground and I had a gun pointed at me. I was naked and eight months pregnant. We had moved in the day before, they were coming to arrest the previous tenant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 46

Boo!

By Repeal2A - 11/09/2025 12:00

Today, I was protesting a newly-opened gun store near my house, demanding safer streets and fewer firearms. My husband and the troglodytes he works with turned up and went inside to browse. Later, he raged at me for embarrassing him in front of his buddies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 290

You deserved it 564

Wobbly

By Anonymous - 15/09/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I tripped getting on an escalator and instinctively grabbed the nearest person to steady myself. That person was a toddler. The mom screamed, I fell anyway, and the toddler just stared at me like I’d ruined his whole week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 124

You deserved it 424

Life comes at you fast

By Anonymous - 18/09/2025 15:00

Today, I’m 20, pregnant, and getting a divorce. I asked my soon to be ex why he even bothered marrying me in the first place. He said it’s because his parents “made him.” I can’t believe I’m going to be a pregnant divorcee before I’m even able to legally have my first drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 466

Snuggle

By Anonymous - 22/09/2025 03:00

Today, I wanted to surprise my partner by leaving a love letter on his car's windshield while he was at work. He texted me later saying, “You know you left that on my coworker’s car, right?” Now some stranger thinks I want to “snuggle forever.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 403

Celebrate!

By Anonymous - 02/10/2025 20:00

Today, I bought some party poppers to surprise my roommate to celebrate her recent promotion. I pulled one the strings too early, in the lobby of our building. A hundred tiny paper stars rained down while my neighbor, who had just spilled her grocery bag out of fright as she entered the building, yelled at me like I was a lunatic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 443

Gushing

By NotCream - 04/10/2025 15:00

Today, I've been having persistent fungal infections and was getting treated by a male gynecologist. I had to go in to give vaginal swab tests. I washed and cleaned before I left, but when I got on the doctor's table I already had so much discharge. The doctor asked, "Is it the medicine?" I had to say no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 103

Thanks but no thanks

By Anonymous - 06/10/2025 09:00

Today, a woman grabbed my arm and told me she wanted to ride me like a stallion then suck me clean afterwards. It would have been tempting were she not my 90 year-old Alzheimer’s-riddled nana, who raised me on her own and took me to church twice a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 592

You deserved it 116

Thanks Dad, but…

By Sad cuck - 09/10/2025 22:00

Today, my dad called in a rage, saying he caught my "cheating whore" girlfriend at a bar on a date. I had to admit to him that she and I participate in a cuckold lifestyle. The sheer disgust and disappointment in his voice has been haunting me all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157

You deserved it 555

Sexy time

By Not such a stud - 24/10/2025 22:00

Today, after a month's-long dry spell, my wife and I finally had sex. It was awkward and terrible, neither of us finished, and she muttered, "I don't know why I missed that" after we gave up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 103

My smol bean baby

By Heather05 - 11/11/2025 15:00

Today, my neighbor knocked on my door and politely asked if I could keep my “crying baby” quiet at night. I live alone. I don’t even have a baby. I have a cat. A very dramatic, needy, attention-hungry cat who yelps when I close any door or leave her eyesight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 141

What did you expect?

By Not Marge - 22/11/2025 09:00

Today, my husband is hurt and upset that our daughter legally changed her name the day she turned 18. I had to ask him, as nicely as I could, what the hell he expected when he named her Lisa and her last name is Simpson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 168

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The Top

Today, I finally found out why all three of my roommates were ignoring me. They like to disinfect everything every time they use it, and I don't. They had a problem with that, so they were hoping that by not talking to me, I'd "notice something was wrong and change." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 933

You deserved it 888

Today, I was participating in an activity to join a program which I really wanted to join. One of the teachers in charge seemed to notice my efforts and asked if I wanted to join the program. I said yes, thinking I had a chance. She laughed, shook her head before saying no and walking away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 557

You deserved it 919

Today, at around 11 p.m., the police made a visit to my house, explaining how my neighbors had thought I was using a universal remote to change their television channels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 304

You deserved it 1 628

Today, our house caught fire. While trying to help my mom get to safety, the word "fuck" accidentally escaped my mouth. Once we were safe, she said I was grounded for swearing. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 183

Today, I received a letter informing me that my husband is considered fit to work and will be receiving reduced benefits. He was rushed to hospital yesterday and has a tube in his throat temporarily breathing for him. I’m sure a nice desk job will suit him just fine then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 586

You deserved it 106

Today, my boss watched me get my waistband hooked on a safety hazard in the warehouse. She included it in the safety report. FML

I agree, your life sucks 280

You deserved it 92