The Top

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Brotherly love

By Sad guy - 08/01/2021 20:01 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I felt so lonely that I was almost jealous of the way Chris Cuomo and Don Lemon playfully express affection for each other on CNN. FML

I agree, your life sucks 676

You deserved it 249

Entitled

By Anonymous - 18/06/2023 15:00

Today, I know my ex has spoiled our daughter. How do I know this? Because I got her a low level job at the same company as me, got her first paycheck and legit asked me, “Is that it? Where’s the rest of my money?” What rest of her money? That’s her wages for a months work. Curse my rich ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 227

Get out of there

By Denali - 27/06/2026 15:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I overheard my mother saying that it is “physically painful” for her not to be mean to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 73

Catflap time

By Anonymous - 24/01/2021 17:01 - Germany

Today, our cat doesn’t care much whether she gets into my room or not. Except at about 3 a.m. each night. That’s the time she sits outside the door, meowing to be let in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 705

You deserved it 155

In for the long haul

By Anonymous - 01/07/2026 22:00 - Australia

Today, I'd booked the cheapest seat on a long flight and ended up between a couple who spent the entire trip arguing through me instead of talking to each other, even after I offered to switch seats. By the end of the flight I probably knew more about their marriage than some of their relatives do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 75

Alexa, play "Wide Open Space" by Mansun

By revolutionbabe - 14/03/2022 10:00

Today, I don't have to set my alarm. I don't have to be anywhere. I can stay up late. But I'm a creature of habit and routine, and having an off day frightens me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 245

By Anonymous - 19/05/2019 00:05

Today, I was seeing my boyfriend for the first time in 3 weeks. I was so excited to see him that I gave him a big hug. He must have been excited to see me too, because he hugged me so tight that he squeezed a fart out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 002

You deserved it 270

Like and subscribe!

By Anonymous - 11/07/2026 09:00 - Canada

Today, after I bought a giant bag of birdseed yesterday because birds kept visiting my balcony, I woke up to dozens of pigeons waiting outside my door like I'd accidentally started a subscription service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92

You deserved it 394

How could you forget?

By James - 31/01/2021 11:01

Today, I realised that my birthday was yesterday. I was so busy with my painting work that I completely forgot. I realised when I got messages from friends in the USA, wishing me a happy birthday. Seriously timezones? FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 307

I don't know, leave me alone

By Anonymous - 07/07/2023 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, my mom and dad went off somewhere for some alone time together. My mom had apparently turned her phone off and my dad left his at home. In that span of time, my brother had accidentally locked himself out of his house, and my sister was also trying to get a hold of them, and now are asking me where they're at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 689

You deserved it 175

By Anonymous - 25/05/2019 12:08

Today, someone overheard my ex talking about ditching me with a year-long lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 740

You deserved it 154

Back to square one

By Anonymous - 10/05/2022 10:00

Today, I finally got the cast off my leg after being unable to walk for 6 weeks, watching daytime TV or playing my husband's Xbox all day. The second the plaster came off, I tried to stand up, tripped over the doctor's foot and broke the apparently still not fully healed leg again in the same spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 156

You deserved it 254

Nothing?

By Anonymous - 22/07/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend is still determined to find my kink. I keep telling him I don’t have one. Literally, I don’t. He isn’t forcing me to do anything physically but he won’t drop the subject. He keeps making all these different suggestions and expecting me to have some magical discovery or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 245

You deserved it 86

Too late

By Anonymous - 16/07/2023 03:00

Today, my husband told me he'd changed his mind and no longer wants children. We already have two kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 918

You deserved it 153

Teamwork works

By Anonymous - 16/02/2021 07:58 - Australia

Today, I had a huge amount of work to get through. Two colleagues offered to help, because one had nothing else to do, and the other couldn't work until I was done. My boss got really pissed at me for "making" them do my job and wasting their time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 062

You deserved it 115

By Anonymous - 08/06/2019 06:00 - United States - Grove City

Today, a childhood friend reached out to me to apologize for our friendship. He was obviously drunk, and admitted that his parents made him become friends with me so that my dad, their landlord, would be easy on them when the rent was short after his mom lost her job. He said he never really liked me and called me a nerd, before hanging up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 830

You deserved it 122

Kitchen nightmare

By Anonymous - 29/12/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I tried to open a jar by tapping the lid on the counter. I tapped it so hard, the jar shattered, and I now have more spaghetti sauce on my pyjama pants than in the pot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 462

The biohazard downstairs

By Anonymous - 09/08/2026 20:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, I’ve lived in my apartment for more than five years and never had more than the occasional housefly. Three months after I got new downstairs neighbors I’ve been hit with a massive roach infestation, and they decided to bring their lovely ant friends with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 59

Dipping out

By Anonymous - 13/01/2025 03:00 - Australia

Today, I was trying to sneak a nap at work by lying on my desk with my arms over my head, hoping my computer screen would cover me. I woke up to find my coworker had taped a sign on the back of my screen that said, "I’m not sleeping, I'm just buffering." Pictures were taken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 674

By Anonymous - 03/07/2019 04:01

Today, my dog got out and ran off at 8 p.m., so I had 11 friends and family looking in the freezing cold night for it until 11:30 p.m. Turns out, the dog was locked in the garage the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 069

You deserved it 1 323

Make it stop

By Ow ow owwww - 15/08/2023 14:00 - United States

Today, I have what is probably a cold sore on my upper lip. I also have a mustache, which keeps rubbing against it. Because of this, no matter what I do, it stings. The next few days are fixing to be very, very long and miserable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 193

Unstable

By Lala - 22/01/2025 12:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, after agreeing to hang out with my husband and his alcoholic mother after his father’s suicide, my mother-in-law found out that my sister-in-law and I playfully insult each other. She lost her mind and practically bit my head off, relapsed, and blamed my “disrespecting her daughter” on said relapse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 66

Not missing out on much

By Anonymous - 30/05/2022 02:01

Today, my mom is obsessed with my academic success, as she was a highschool dropout, and actually gives me more homework than my school does, all so I’ll be more advanced than my peers. I barely know what a television is anymore, since it’s been so long I’ve had enough free time to watch one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 063

You deserved it 177

This is fine

By Anonymous - 19/08/2023 16:00

Today, my husband has a chronic illness and can't work. We have 2 special needs kids who need a lot of assistance. Rent continues to go up and went up this year $570 for a total of $1800. I've taken up a second job to make ends meet, but it's increasing my depression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 994

You deserved it 196

No thanks!

By Anonymous - 31/01/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I was at a wedding, and during the bouquet toss, I stood back and let the single ladies have their moment. The bouquet flew straight at me, hit me in the face, and I instinctively grabbed it. Now everyone thinks I’m desperate to get married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 120

Downward spiral

By 1)rooping 1=lower - 25/08/2023 22:00

Today, my soon-to-be-ex husband raised the bar. He sold our former marital home and put the money into a college fund for MY nieces. Now he looks great to my family, he already has a new place to live (thanks to his rich parents), and I’m stuck living with a college friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 221

Bladder control

By Anonymous - 27/08/2023 14:00

Today, while driving my son and his friend home, I was so frantic to pee, I was bouncing up and down in my seat. I stopped and ran into a store but it was too late. There was a line and I made it 11 seconds. I was radiating heat from the humiliation of walking past dozens of people after peeing my pants. I even apologized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 166

Can we fix it?

By Anonymous - 07/02/2025 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my street had a power cut while I was on my PS5. Luckily, they got it back on 4 hours later and my PS5 automatically repaired the damage to my save file. The power went off again 15 minutes later but came back on almost straight away, like a blip, but now my PS5 is dead. It won’t even turn on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 510

You deserved it 122

Get a second opinion

By Anonymous - 31/08/2023 16:00 - Australia

Today, I saw my specialist and I told her that one of my medications is messing with my head too much. I said that it’s making my depression so bad I have started cutting again, and want to walk in front of a truck. They said I just have to "suck it up". FML

I agree, your life sucks 785

You deserved it 145

Neighborly

By Michael McMike - 11/02/2025 20:00 - Canada - Whitehorse

Today, as I always do when we get a lot of snow, I shovelled the snow off my elderly neighbor’s driveway. I slipped and fell into a snowbank, breaking my collarbone, and she had to call 911 to help me out because I couldn't snow angel my way up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 72

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The Top

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I've been crushing on for a while. When he dropped me off, I said thank you and that we should do it again sometime. He replied, "Yeah, maybe next Halloween." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 812

You deserved it 816

Today, I was taking a piss when a old lady somehow managed to wander in. She blushed, chuckled and apologized, "Sorry, little fella!" before leaving. I don't know what size she was commenting on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 268

You deserved it 849

Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 977

You deserved it 1 732

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him why he was with me. His answer was, "Well, the last girl I dated was really smart and she always made me feel dumb, so I decided to switch things up a bit. You make me feel like a genius, babe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 619

You deserved it 8 067

Today, I saw a very attractive female police officer while at the DMV. Thinking myself suave, I asked her: "Is it sexual harassment if I tell you how beautiful I think you are, and ask for your phone number?" Apparently it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 254

You deserved it 86 574

Today, I found out that the last of my super feminist "I'm never getting tied to a man" college friends got engaged. Apparently, I should have tried that tactic, as my current partner in life is my goldfish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 485

You deserved it 630