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By Carlos Cervantes_1981647997 - 08/08/2019 06:00

Today, like any other day, I look just like Kim Jung-un. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 553

You deserved it 221

We were on a break!

By Anonymous - 13/04/2021 17:01

Today, it's been two weeks since my girlfriend of many years and I decided to take a short break from each other. We'd been fighting a lot and felt like some space would help the situation. I found out today that, at some point during those two weeks, she decided to go and have sex with my (now ex) best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 356

You deserved it 309

Bridezilla strikes again

By Anonymous - 29/04/2021 10:58

Today, I told my sister I felt like her friends didn't like me, since they were ignoring my questions, opinions, etc., in the bridesmaids' chat, but were all over each other's messages. She kicked me from her bridal party, saying her friends wouldn't want me at the bridal shower and bachelorette party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 295

You deserved it 147

By anon - 03/09/2017 21:45 - Belgium - Aarschot

Today, after an exhausting renovation, we finally took some time to cook a nice dinner. We got to relax for a full hour before our downstairs neighbour informed us that any water we use leaks through her ceiling. Four experts came. No one can find the leak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 373

You deserved it 236

Whatcha been up to?

By Just another Dude - 02/10/2017 13:00

Today, I spilled vanilla yogurt on my pants while eating breakfast, but I forgot to clean it up. It left a very conspicuous white stain on my pants, that was there the entire day. I only noticed it when I looked in the mirror after getting home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 973

You deserved it 988

Alexa, play "Confusion" by New Order

By Anonymous - 16/09/2019 02:00

Today, I found out my husband has been telling everyone he doesn't want a baby. He has been telling me he does. We have been trying for months. I'm now pregnant and confused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 805

You deserved it 171

Sit and stew

By Anonymous - 19/09/2019 00:02

Today, my dog and I got sprayed by a skunk. I have no tomato juice or baking soda, and the bus doesn't come for another 3 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 444

You deserved it 146

No internet, just cuddles

By Anonymous - 28/09/2019 16:00

Today, my cat decided that the best place for her to pee was over the surge protector where my modem, router, and printer are plugged in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 556

You deserved it 226

Onan would be proud

By concernedcousin - 05/10/2019 12:00

Today, my little twelve year-old cousin who is staying with us for a while so his parents can "work out issues" ran into my room, his face ghostly white. He begged me to take him to the hospital because he "tugged" on his penis too much in the shower, and was "bleeding milky stuff." Sigh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 050

You deserved it 196

Paranoid much?

By Anonymous - 14/10/2019 14:00 - United States

Today, I got pushed around by several suspicious mothers in a playground. I just wanted to sit down and rest my feet while I waited for my wife to finish her shopping across the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 654

You deserved it 186

Pizza? In this economy?

By I do cook just FYI - 05/06/2025 09:00 - United States - New York

Today, yet again, we have a fridge full of food, but my wife asked if we can order pizza in front of the kids, who all started jumping in excitement yelling, "PIZZA!" Now I can either say no and deal with pouting and tantrums, or waste money on crappy pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 144

Tetchy

By Brokendishes - 21/08/2022 18:00

Today, my husband broke a set of dishes, told me I had to clean it all up, and stormed out of the house. It’s now 3:30am and he still hasn’t come home. Our 5 year-old son keeps asking about him. What warranted all this? Asking him how his day went. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 208

You deserved it 146

Free the Flow!

By Lunar-Spice - 23/10/2019 14:00

Today, I went to take a shower. I noticed a funky smell, but I just assumed it was from whoever had been there last. When I pulled the shower curtain back, I found out that my sister has stopped using feminine hygiene products for her period. It looked like someone had died in the bathtub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 897

You deserved it 188

It's the new thing!

By Anonymous - 25/10/2019 06:02

Today, I fell asleep while at an outside birthday party in the sun for a five-year-old. That five-year-old put an animal cracker on my forehead. I now have a rhino-shaped tan line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 434

You deserved it 1 047

Curiosity!

By Anonymous - 31/12/2019 14:00

Today, I got curious and decided to look for my ex's social media after he blocked me off everything. I found him on LinkedIn and it is only after I click on his profile that I remembered, he will be notified that I looked him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 3 652

Deliverude

By omfgwhywhywhy - 22/03/2020 19:18 - United States

Today, I had to take a delivery to a known hoarder. I was braced for the sight of the house, but not the naked fat guy and the smell of dead cat when he answered the door. To top it off, they didn't even tip me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 778

You deserved it 200

Disconnect

By Sad vegan girl - 15/08/2025 09:00 - United States - New York

Today, I told my younger sister that meat comes from cute animals like chickens and cows, hoping she'd want to be vegan like me. Instead, she laughed and made up a song about how chickens turn into tenders and cows turn into cheeseburgers. I ended up being the one who got upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 1 342

He's a very naughty boy

By Anonymous - 29/03/2020 08:00

Today, a Jehovah's Witness followed me around, talking about Jesus. My dad's a pastor. I hear this stuff all day, every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 707

You deserved it 194

Close quarters

By smellay - 14/04/2020 23:00

Today, I had to shit really bad while I was in bed with my girlfriend. Luckily she was sleeping. I didn’t want to be obvious, so I closed all the doors, crept into the bathroom and sat on the toilet. I accidentally let out the loudest fart. I got a text saying, “Walls are thin, you good?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 876

You deserved it 389

Poor old Kermit

By FrogMyLife - 30/07/2021 15:59 - United Kingdom - Rickmansworth

Today, I've been single for so long, I very nearly had a wet dream about an anthropomorphic frog. A FROG. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 207

Better out than in

By Anonymous - 20/05/2020 02:00

Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 938

You deserved it 425

Revealed

By PartyPoop - 28/08/2021 02:00

Today, at my gender reveal party, my daughter threw a huge temper tantrum and knocked over tables and chairs screaming, “Fuck this shit!” when the reveal came out pink. She’s five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 1 280

Time is of the essence

By N/A - 26/05/2020 02:00

Today, my job offer from a Fortune 500 company was canceled because of the coronavirus. This is the third time this year a job I passed interviews and tests for got canceled. I’m an international student who just graduated last week. I only have 90 days to find a job to stay in the US. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 843

You deserved it 215

My body, my choice

By Anonymous - 06/04/2024 14:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, I had to sit and listen in mortification as my mother tearfully told our therapist how much sleep she loses over my being morbidly obese. She doesn't seem to care that I'm body positive and happy with the way I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 1 118

By StickyVag - 08/08/2018 01:30 - New Zealand

Today, the fire alarm went off halfway through my bikini wax. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 775

You deserved it 194

Marriage benefits

By Anonymous - 10/09/2021 17:00

Today, my husband told me he’s gay, has a boyfriend and will be living with him, but he wants to stay married because it has good tax benefits, plus our joint mortgage, and if he comes out to his father he’ll be cut from the will. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 022

You deserved it 123

FIFA 2022

By GettingalawyerASAP - 01/12/2022 16:00

Today, me and three other colleagues were fired for playing the World Cup on our PCs. We weren’t even watching the games, we just let it play on a separate tab while we did our due diligence at work. Turns out, there’s a snitch in our office, none other than the girl who said, “That sport shit is lame.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 614

You deserved it 985

Doomed

By SweptWolf - 06/06/2020 23:02

Today, my fiancée handed me her engagement ring back and told me she felt like she's pressuring me into marriage, so to make me feel better about it we’re no longer engaged. On top of this, I found out she’s started talking to her ex again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 202

The call of the wild

By not outdoorsy - 10/07/2020 14:02

Today, I haven’t been camping since I was a kid. I decided to give it another shot. I bought all the best equipment, researched all the great locations, planned a whole weekend. Turns out I still fucking hate camping and now I’m out over $400. FML

I agree, your life sucks 581

You deserved it 2 240

By singing

By Ramb0 - 21/12/2019 01:00 - United Kingdom - Christchurch

Today, I was headbanging so hard to a song in the shower that I hit my head on the wall and got a concussion. I'm now in hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 2 197

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The Top

Today, I accidentally stood up my first date ever. How? I spent all of last night cleaning my parents' house for extra spending money to make sure the date went perfect, but I ended up sleeping through the alarm as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 591

You deserved it 3 578

Today, I finally gave in to my long-distance boyfriend's requests and texted him dirty things. Any time I would send him something, he would reply, "What?" or "What do you mean?" Either I'm not doing this right, or I'm in a relationship with the most innocent person ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 072

You deserved it 7 378

Today, I confronted my girlfriend about cheating on me. Her response was that it's not cheating since she is getting paid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 973

You deserved it 4 756

Today, I found out I can’t get in-state tuition at my college, all because I’m under 24 and considered a "dependent" student; therefore my parents must prove state residency on my behalf. I lost both my parents to COVID last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 550

You deserved it 102

Today, after a night of back pain, fatigue, and wrestling with my crying, screaming son, who couldn’t sleep, I woke up to find my laptop wouldn’t power on because my daughter spilled ice cream on it. I need my laptop for my new job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 049

You deserved it 168

Today, I was texted out of the blue by a girl I treated to dinner last year. Since then, we'd chatted and met in passing a few times, but she'd turned down or cancelled all my other date invitations. Sadly, she wasn't trying to meet up. She wanted $500 to benefit a male friend, who was down on his luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 094

You deserved it 135