Poopoo peepee Kids I just can't hide it - FML

I just can't hide it

doomeddaddy - - United States

Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
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Anonymous - 16/06/2009 07:03 - United States

Today, my toddler peed in his potty for the first time. He was so excited to show me that he flung the pot in the air dousing my face with his piss. Then he laughed. FML

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Pride and joy

Anonymous - 07/11/2025 00:00

Today, my toddler finally used the potty for the first time. I was so excited, I FaceTimed my mom to show her. My kid then proudly picked up the potty bowl and dumped it on my lap. FML

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Good job

Anonymous - 11/01/2010 18:08 - United States

Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML

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TiredMommy - 20/04/2017 18:00 - United States - Southbridge

Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML

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jbhadafuckedupday - 15/03/2018 01:30

Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML

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Training day

Anonymous - 09/11/2011 21:52 - United States

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

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Anonymous - 01/06/2010 16:43 - United States

Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML

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Potty drama

NeverEndingBathtime_ - 03/08/2017 20:00

Today, my two year-old is being potty trained. He got the gist of it and actually did #1 and #2 in the potty and after our little celebratory dance, I went to get him a cookie (which took me two seconds). I come back to see him covered in shit and pee because he tried to go empty the potty himself. FML

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Well done sweetie

Mommy - 29/09/2010 22:47 - United States

Today, my daughter watched a potty training video on Sesame Street. In the middle of the video, she got up and ran to her potty to practice. She then announced, "All done!", and proudly closed the lid to her potty. She then immediately stood on top of it and peed. FML

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When you gotta go…

Anonymous - 07/04/2014 17:43 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, in an attempt to potty train my step-son, my boyfriend and I put underwear on him, hoping that when he peed himself, he would realize using the potty is the way to go. Instead, he peed while sitting on the couch, got up, took off the underwear, and then switched seats. FML

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flockz 19

Wednesday 3 August 2011 22:16

marking his territory. he's gonna ask for a sandwich next.

Infamous_Hawk 6

Wednesday 3 August 2011 22:14

Congradulations, I guess.

CleverBastard 8

Wednesday 3 August 2011 22:34

I bet you were PISSED

nicksand 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 22:48

make him put his nose in it

kiakia0131 23

Wednesday 3 August 2011 22:50

It's only pee. Be thankful it didn't get on the walls and ceiling. He's a little kid and stuff like that happens. Besides, he's only learning so things like this are bound to happen.

XxgreymoonxX 8

Wednesday 3 August 2011 22:52

least he learned? :D

birdfreak 24

Wednesday 3 August 2011 22:53

He has more pee left?

ravenxcorvinus 9

Wednesday 3 August 2011 23:27

it's one of those moments where you wished you should have put some newspapers down lol

bnvc 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 23:34

AWWW hahahaha.

kduubb 7

Wednesday 3 August 2011 23:38

my little brother did the same thing before/:

HichSchko46 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 23:51

Hahaha! How old is your brother?

kduubb 7

Wednesday 3 August 2011 23:54

He was small, like 2 or 3

HichSchko46 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 1:36

Haha. He has a good excuse. 2 more years and that excuse expires. I live in SD too. Freaken hot out!

kduubb 7

Thursday 4 August 2011 4:14

i kno i love it(:

jlh2283 1

Wednesday 3 August 2011 23:52

I guess a drop in the toilet is worth more than a river outside of it... Beware guests that's not water from the shower...

ninjaandreaa 9

Thursday 4 August 2011 0:03

SWAG

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Jealousy Underwear Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I bled through a tampon and pad in half an hour. When changing them, I somehow managed to streak blood across the bathroom floor, like a small creature was murdered and dragged. I have never menstruated this hard before in my life. Anyone know how to get blood out of white grout? Not asking for a friend. FML

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Today, my boyfriend of 5 years decided to buy a $2500 taxidermied wolf on eBay. This is the same guy who refuses to get engaged because it would "cost too much right now." FML

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Today, I fell off my truck and landed on one of the stakes my wife uses to keep her plants upright. I landed on it so perfectly that it went through my shorts and perfectly straight up my asshole for a good 4 inches before it snapped. My wife helpfully removed it, but I still spent a night in hospital. FML

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Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started wanking. FML

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Today, my friend spent the night. I now know that she masturbates in her sleep. FML

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Today, I made homemade pasta from scratch. I spent hours kneading the dough, rolling it out, and cutting it into perfect strips. When I went to cook it, I realized that I forgot to add salt to the dough. The pasta tasted like damp cardboard. FML

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