mikeydamnross

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A propos de Mikeydamnross

I ride scooters professionally! Ask me about it!

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Mikeydamnross's favorite FMLs

Looking good

By ShutTheFuCupcake - this FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Calgary

Today, I flexed so hard for a selfie, I gave myself a hernia. FML

agreeclassic 24 787

vote type 1 71 709

Sorry Mr Whiskers

By Brody89 - 09/04/2014 18:40 - United States - Vancouver

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

agreeclassic 74 069

vote type 1 38 097

By Anonymous - 27/03/2014 23:03 - Canada - Sackville

Today, I was sitting in the coffee shop where my boyfriend and I used to go before he broke up with me about a week ago. I was missing him and wishing he was there, when all of a sudden this 14-year-old kid comes up to me and says, "He's not coming, you may as well go home." FML

agreeclassic 48 674

vote type 1 6 881

By Vampprobs - 25/03/2014 01:52 - United States - Skandia

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

agreeclassic 42 169

vote type 1 3 230

By Anonymous - 18/03/2014 21:31 - United States - Arlington

Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML

agreeclassic 46 215

vote type 1 4 007