lillyraye

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Lillyraye's favorite FMLs

By treegirl - 26/07/2009 05:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

agreeclassic 592

vote type 1 124

You tried…

By shart up, your puns suck - 01/06/2014 18:34 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I clogged my girlfriend's toilet, so being a gentleman, I tried to rectify the situation. I plunged the holy fuck out of that damned toilet, only for her to accuse me of jacking off because I was taking so long. When she stormed in and the smell hit her, she called me a pig. I just can't win. FML

agreeclassic 52 816

vote type 1 5 576

By I Have Failed - 02/04/2014 20:10 - Spain - Madrid

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

agreeclassic 54 199

vote type 1 6 611

Red flag

By Anonymous - 15/01/2014 18:25 - Italy - Pistoia

Today, I found out that the generous gift from my boyfriend of a new iPhone was only given so he could use the "Find my phone" function to make sure I'm always where I say I am each day. I'm being stalked by my own boyfriend. FML

agreeclassic 55 209

vote type 1 8 958

By Alice99 - 12/11/2013 17:39 - United States - Bothell

Today, my sister introduced our parents to her new boyfriend. He's my boyfriend, and he told me he was going to be out of state for a few weeks on business. FML

agreeclassic 64 010

vote type 1 4 028

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Alice99_fml 6

Wednesday 13 November 2013 3:04

I feel like my post didn't have enough information. No, my sister did not know we were together. I had not introduced him to my family yet. Yes, I did break up with him. No, I did not feel bad about it. Yes, my sister ended it with him after I told her what was going on.