zdbh

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Zdbh's favorite FMLs

By RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

agreeclassic 800

vote type 1 1 943

By sophie - 13/04/2011 16:36 - United States

Today, my teacher told me I wasn't pretty enough to play the princess part in the play. FML

agreeclassic 45 805

vote type 1 5 765

By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 15:14 - United States

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

agreeclassic 80 762

vote type 1 6 428

By hopeless - 26/02/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I cheated on my math exam. I still failed. FML

agreeclassic 13 019

vote type 1 74 412

By PlayboyBunny - 19/02/2011 07:20 - United States

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

agreeclassic 33 653

vote type 1 8 648