angry_wildebeast

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Angry_wildebeast's favorite FMLs

Joe Smooth move

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was in school when I spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her, I broke her nose. FML

agreeclassic 13 524

vote type 1 38 478

By Rehab - 11/02/2010 19:58 - United States

Today, I was looking through my computer's history to find a website I had visited. I found an online forum where my son was discussing how to inject Oxycontin. FML

agreeclassic 32 412

vote type 1 3 735

Hangry

By Prodigy - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I ran into a former college classmate at Subway. He gushed on and on about how I was the only one in our class with true potential. Then I asked him what kind of sandwich he wanted, because 3 years out of college, Subway is still the only place that will hire a music major. FML

agreeclassic 31 734

vote type 1 8 174

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 00:03 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML

agreeclassic 35 996

vote type 1 8 860

By Krit - 10/02/2010 15:10 - United States

Today, my drunk mother got into a fight with the lady at Krystal burger. Why? "Because the bitch said they aren't making special orders." FML

agreeclassic 24 942

vote type 1 2 608