yukonmade

Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

Today, while jogging, I realized my face jiggles more than my breasts. FML

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML