DeeEss

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27 years-old
Wednesday 31 December 1997
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Deeess's favorite FMLs

By BimmerDriver - 30/06/2013 16:34 - United States - New York

Today, what started off as an amazing date with my girlfriend ended with me driving her drunk ass home while she sat in the backseat making out with her new boyfriend. FML

agreeclassic 53 232

vote type 1 11 394

BimmerDriver app_comment_confession_title

BimmerDriver 23

Monday 1 July 2013 5:38

Because I won't let anyone drive drunk, no matter who it is. And it's cheaper to drive them home as opposed to paying for a taxi.

By TooYoungForThis - 30/06/2013 04:36 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML

agreeclassic 45 178

vote type 1 5 004

By unluckydude - 29/06/2013 22:19 - Colombia - Tunja

Today, my co-worker thought it would be funny to tell her husband that she cheated on him with me. I'm scared to death and I don't dare to go out by myself. FML

agreeclassic 43 997

vote type 1 4 511

Oddly specific

By Angry and Confused - 29/06/2013 09:55 - United States - Reno

Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML

agreeclassic 53 189

vote type 1 2 964

By Auroraen - 28/06/2013 01:23 - United States - Oswego

Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML

agreeclassic 44 005

vote type 1 10 462

Auroraen app_comment_confession_title

Auroraen 8

Friday 28 June 2013 18:00

OP here. Wow. Thanks for all the nice words, guys. My "puppy" is a 120lb, 9 month old Great Dane. Her name is Lily, and she is worse than Marmaduke and Marly put together. She is a total troublemaker. I had made zucchini bread, beef stew, a bunch of sides, as well as a cake. All of it was from scratch. I had actually put one of those baby gates across the entry-way to the kitchen, and she ended up knocking it over. Next time, I think she's going in the cage while I take a shower. And btw, I did just order a pizza. Everyone had a good laugh at me. And yes, she's practically impossible to stay mad at.