Liams_wifey

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Liams_wifey's favorite FMLs

By Ixlovexwaffles - 29/04/2015 20:33

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

agreeclassic 37 013

vote type 1 5 707

Ixlovexwaffles app_comment_confession_title

Ixlovexwaffles 0

Thursday 30 April 2015 20:26

I would have laughed it off had she made the post a week later, it's the fact that I told her specifically not to post anything or talk to anyone about it for at least a few days so I could announce it to everyone else. She knew I told her first. It's the fact that that is how it was announced.

By Anonymous - 26/03/2015 13:20 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

agreeclassic 42 520

vote type 1 3 647

User notice

By Anonymous - 16/05/2015 02:52 - United States - Rockwall

Today, I had to slowly explain to my brother that spooning has nothing to do with using a spoon to clean out a woman's vagina after sex. FML

agreeclassic 38 608

vote type 1 3 124

Bad women's anatomy

By Anonymous - 03/05/2015 05:37 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that me switching to "super" sized tampons does not mean I've been having sex with other men with bigger penises, and that my vagina hasn't been "stretched bigger". FML

agreeclassic 37 345

vote type 1 3 582

By henrylikestreats - 30/04/2015 18:04 - United States - Mayer

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

agreeclassic 31 706

vote type 1 4 654

henrylikestreats app_comment_confession_title

henrylikestreats 22

Friday 1 May 2015 4:51

All of these puns have me in tears, I swear. I am currently growing out my hair after cutting it all off to be donated. It has gone through every awkward stage imaginable, including the constantly-in-my-eyes stage, the is-it-long-enough-for-a-ponytail stage, and, of course, the mullet. After a few weeks of dealing with the mullet, I decided to cut it, and that is how I ended up with this mess. I have heard Shrek quotes everywhere I have gone since and I can't stop laughing at myself. Thank you for making my night, everybody.