iMeowzAlot

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My owners house, I'm a cat
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A propos de Imeowzalot

I have no idea... Hi... I'm a cat that can type English don't ask how I just can. I also happen to know that the answer to the ultimate question of life the universe and everything is... 42. Yeah... And yes I can meow. Meow. The cat in my pic. is stare cat/ graphics cat. He is a good cat. Well bye now I'm off to do cat things.

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Imeowzalot's favorite FMLs

By seriously - 20/04/2009 23:05 - Canada

Today, I had a substitute teacher for my dance class. I noticed at one point, he took out a camera. The principal came in, everyone was going crazy, and the teacher was dragged out of the classroom. He was taking videos and pictures of us dancing. Turns out he was a registered sex offender. FML

agreeclassic 111 769

vote type 1 5 379

By bloodless - 05/01/2016 05:17 - Canada - Grande Prairie

Today, I went for bloodwork. It's routine for me, so I was ready for the nurse to put in the needle and take my blood. It went in fine, but right after, she slowly pulled the needle out, then wondered why the blood stopped. She then moved it back and forth in my arm while I panicked silently. FML

agreeclassic 22 342

vote type 1 1 553

By Nile - 08/12/2015 17:21 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She said no because she doesn't want to be tied down for the rest of her life. We already have 3 children, a mortgage, and joint bank accounts. How much more tied down could we possibly get? FML

agreeclassic 30 954

vote type 1 2 842

By Anonymous - 04/12/2015 20:36 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML

agreeclassic 28 127

vote type 1 2 944

By Anonymous - 18/11/2015 02:13 - United States - Herndon

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML

agreeclassic 30 033

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