polkadotsocks

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Alberta, Canada
36 years-old
Tuesday 11 April 1989
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Polkadotsocks's favorite FMLs

DUDE! WTF?

By imanidiot - 03/03/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I'd been sat in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars, and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through, I heard a tap on my driver's window. It was a police officer. FML

agreeclassic 32 276

vote type 1 152 516

By Shantwozzlah - 26/03/2012 16:15 - United States - Kissimmee

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML

agreeclassic 25 872

vote type 1 3 596

By shocked - 25/08/2011 18:10 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML

agreeclassic 34 788

vote type 1 5 131

Surprise, MFer!

By Anonymous - 15/09/2010 23:34 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I broke up. When I got home from work, I came home to glitter. EVERYWHERE. Guess who forgot to get the key to his apartment back from his ex-girlfriend. The guy who's having his family over for dinner tonight. FML

agreeclassic 26 498

vote type 1 13 102

By captainkevineff - 11/03/2010 14:44 - United States

Today, I learned that even though they say that an apple a day keeps the doctor away, it doesn't keep him from putting a Q-tip up your ass. FML

agreeclassic 25 968

vote type 1 3 650