lizardfeet

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Lizardfeet's favorite FMLs

By Username - 14/07/2011 20:09 - United States

Today, I walked in on my father and brother attempting to harmonize their farts. FML

agreeclassic 36 340

vote type 1 5 778

By Breanne - 14/07/2011 15:25 - Canada

Today, at work, a regular started talking to me. Subject of choice? His overwhelming amount of earwax. Apparently he'd like to make a candle out of it once he goes to the doctor to get it removed. FML

agreeclassic 26 273

vote type 1 2 328

Work sucks

By Anonymous - 08/07/2011 19:43 - United States

Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML

agreeclassic 35 424

vote type 1 2 648

Get it?

By Jessica - 08/07/2011 00:58 - Australia

Today, I met my boyfriend's sophisticated grandparents. I politely introduced myself. The first words to come out of his granny's mouth were, "If something happens to him, you won't get a f*cking cent of the insurance money, you hear?" FML

agreeclassic 39 716

vote type 1 3 154

By JohnyP - 09/07/2011 07:04 - United States

Today, after having my car been broken into the day before because I didn't lock it, I made sure I locked my doors. When I got off shift and entered the parking lot, I noticed a brick had been thrown through my windshield and a note that said, "Nice Try". FML

agreeclassic 44 514

vote type 1 3 528