hallelujahlove

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Hallelujahlove's favorite FMLs

By poop - 08/03/2009 23:57 - United States

Today, I woke up at my grandparents house since my mom was out of town, still half asleep i went to brush my teeth. Mid brush my mouth started getting numb I looked again at the tooth paste I used..turns out it was my grandpa's anti-itch anal cream. FML

agreeclassic 70 086

vote type 1 22 168

By mcullen21 - 12/06/2009 18:50 - United States

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

agreeclassic 157 522

vote type 1 11 726

Nice try

By Anonymous - 12/06/2009 04:41 - United States

Today, I discovered that my fiancé had tried to fake his own death because he thought it would be easier than confessing to the affair he was having. FML

agreeclassic 71 691

vote type 1 3 498

By apav - 11/06/2009 11:52 - Australia

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

agreeclassic 85 919

vote type 1 24 416

Uncanny

By Weezylover - 26/05/2009 08:24 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, says "It's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML

agreeclassic 70 786

vote type 1 8 001