Work: Today, I was cleaning up after closing when I heard a mouse squeak....

Content almost refused by staff

By TheBarista - 13/04/2016 01:25 - United States - Bronx

Today, I was cleaning up after closing when I heard a mouse squeak. I then proceeded to search for and try to catch it for 2 hours, before coming to the realization that my stuffy nose was the source of the squeaking, not a mouse. FML.

agreeclassic 3

vote type 1 0

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

TOP COMMENTS

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I answered the door to two Mormon girls from America. I live in the UK and am not religious at all, but I was too polite to slam the door and ended up letting them in. An hour later, a copy of 'The Book of Mormon' and 'My Pathway to Baptism' and I think I'm now a Mormon. FML

agreeclassic 3 197

vote type 1 1 627

Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML

agreeclassic 32 414

vote type 1 3 963

Today, while I was in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been Facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

agreeclassic 48 866

vote type 1 8 487

Today, my aunt asked me to have my 13-year-old autistic cousin stay over for the night. When he got here, he told me his mom forgot his Vaseline, and asked if I'd be a dear and go get some for him. His mom informed me that he uses it to masturbate. FML

agreeclassic 9 868

vote type 1 758

Today, I was texting the guy I like. I asked him why our friend didn't want to come to the movies with us. He replied, "She didn't want to be the third wheel, but it's not like I'm going to put the moves on you. I'm out of your league, and you're socially awkward anyway." That's just what I wanted. FML

agreeclassic 2 180

vote type 1 352

Today, I saw a kid throwing a tantrum in a supermarket. Thinking it was a matter of lack of discipline, I waited for the kid’s mother to come out of the bathroom to tell her how naughty her son was being. I then got to watch her beat her son to the point of unconsciousness. FML

agreeclassic 622

vote type 1 1 461