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By Clementine - 27/11/2012 11:36 - Australia - Saint Kilda

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 249

You deserved it 4 638

Wasting away

By Anonymous - 14/09/2021 01:59 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I keep trying to use the Meetup app to meet people, but life keeps trolling me, and every event I even attempt to join (all virtual so far) has been met with no social interaction. It feels like life keeps hammering in the idea that I should just sit in my room and atrophy away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 139

By maddy - 21/01/2009 17:03 - France

Today, I'm looking for a job, and the employer I spoke to by phone was busy, but before hanging up he said, "We'll call you soon." I still wonder how he plans to do so without even having asked for my number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 812

You deserved it 2 638

Ongoing situation

By Anonymous - 08/11/2025 00:00

Today, I'm not showing any symptoms of Covid, despite visiting with a friend three days ago whose family tested positive yesterday, but my stepmom is still convinced I have it. I checked a Cleveland clinic website to prove I didn't have it, only to find out I could be asymptomatic for up to ten days after exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 507

Bob the Builder

By brunnells22 - 23/06/2020 23:00

Today, I was feeling pretty proud of myself for building an Ikea shelf/dresser combo completely by myself. When going to put the last drawer together, I dropped one of the boards. The corner landed perfectly in the middle of my phone screen, shattering it. It's going to cost $230 to fix it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 439

You deserved it 303

The struggle is real

By Anonymous - 10/11/2025 09:00

Today, my husband keeps falling sick or imagining that he's sick. We started the year with flu, then back pain, then a sprain, then a ligament tear, and now a bacterial infection. On the days he's not sick, he has zero interest in physical intimacy, scared that he'll catch an STD. We're a married monogamous couple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 101

Best day of your life

By Cellist - 14/12/2022 15:00

Today, it's the wedding of a two friends that I introduced each other to about a year ago. I'll be enjoying it on my couch. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 131

You deserved it 123

Granny Smith

By TEETH - 12/11/2025 09:00

Today, in an attempt to eat healthier snacks, I took an apple to work. I ate it after lunch. Now my teeth are full of bits of apple and I can't focus on my work because it's distracting. Three hours until I can get home and floss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 326

Mood breaker

By Anonymous - 30/09/2021 23:00 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, I was having sexy time with my girlfriend when she said she needed to pee. She came back 5 minutes later and started talking about how she hasn't seen her best friend in ages and misses her. Needless to say, I couldn't get the man downstairs back up when we continued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 134

You deserved it 198

Home alone

By Jdogg - 15/11/2025 00:00

Today, I was home alone, blasting music, dancing in my underwear, singing into a wooden spoon. I turned around mid-performance to see my landlord standing in the kitchen. I’d forgotten about the maintenance appointment I'd scheduled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 425

Quite the doozy

By Anonymous - 07/05/2024 12:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, my wife has moved into the guest room and has been giving me the cold shoulder ever since I asked for a paternity test for our kids. She swears she’s never cheated, so what’s she so offended for? Women make no sense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 1 693

By NOIDIDNOT - 19/11/2012 06:21 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, I had my wisdom teeth taken out. I vaguely remember telling the doctor that I'm a virgin. Several times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 964

You deserved it 2 981

The grind

By Gunaditya - 26/09/2021 23:00

Today, what did I get after a long, tiring week? A long, depressing weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 845

You deserved it 140

Work sucks, I know

By Anonymous - 01/01/2023 22:00 - Malaysia

Today, it's my second week of internship, I have like 8 more weeks to go and I'm dreading it. It's an office internship and I HATE being in office environments. The sounds of the phone ringing, doorbell dinging, loud typing, and fluorescent lights? Argh, I want to end myself! FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 947

None of my business

By proud cashier - 08/05/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, a man walked through my line with a XL bottle of lotion and many boxes of tissues. As I was ringing him up, the customer broke the silence by saying, "Yeah my son won't stop using the cooking oil for his 'personal time'", finger-air-quotes and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 103

WAKEY WAKEY

By Anonymous - 19/11/2025 09:00

Today, I woke up to the sound of my own voice yelling, “GET UP, YOU LAZY CUNT!” on repeat. It took me a moment to remember I'd drunkenly recorded my own alarm last night because I thought it would “motivate” me. It scared me so much I fell off the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 491

Hot mess

By Tasji - 27/07/2009 06:24 - Canada

Today, I sent in a fake story to a website that supports a yearly festival in my small town, thinking it would boost their spirits. It was how my boyfriend proposed to me at last year's festival. Now the local news station wants to do a story about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 856

You deserved it 81 166

Long flight, enduring smell

By Anonymous - 25/12/2022 12:00

Today, the line for the bathroom on my flight was so long that the passenger next to me couldn't hold it any longer, so he just let it all loose in his pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 052

You deserved it 96

By 2dumb2drive - 12/02/2011 04:06 - United States

Today, I thought it would be fun to drive into a stack of some empty cardboard boxes on my street. They weren't empty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 125

You deserved it 57 503

By Hungry - 14/01/2009 15:01 - United States

Today, a drunk girl asked me for directions to her hotel. I had just bought an empanada and was feeling good, so I agree to look up the address on my phone. Two minutes and a text charge later, I got the address. Out of inebriated glee, she hugged me and knocked the tasty empanada out of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 634

You deserved it 4 525

Bizarre Love Triangle

By Anonymous - 07/10/2021 05:00

Today, I was told by my boyfriend and best friend that they have feelings for each other. I also just found I was pregnant. We have 16 months left of our 18 month lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 330

You deserved it 186

Introverts of the world, unite

By 404: Backbone Not Found - 04/01/2023 21:00

Today, I realized that the title of my memoir may as well be, “I Didn’t Want To, but I Felt Like I Had No Choice.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 742

You deserved it 846

Loud and clear

By Anonymous - 16/05/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, my mother-in-law got me a pair of $2 socks for my birthday. Usually, I don't care… until I found out she got my husband's friend, not even best friend, a $100 gift card, and offered him her free hotel room at the casinos. This is the fifth holiday in a row I've received gifts under $10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 93

By 16seconds - 08/02/2010 01:56 - United States

Today, I had to buy a wrist splint for my carpal tunnel syndrome. Not because I'm a computer programmer or some hot shot web designer but because I spend ALL of my time playing Solitaire on my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 900

You deserved it 33 219

High on emotion

By Anonymous - 10/07/2020 05:00

Today, a woman I’ve liked for years falsely claimed to be strung out on crystal meth rather than just turning me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 163

Transplant

By Anonymous - 31/12/2022 12:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I have manager-level education, an MBA, a second management master's, and I'm on my way for a PhD, but I'm also a migrant who is stuck doing a shitty job because the damn country I have migrated to (Canada) has very little regards for previous non-canadian work experience, even as a manager! I gave up so much for this!? FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 561

By anonymous - 10/11/2012 11:02 - United States

Today, I was playing Apples to Apples with my girlfriend and a few others. The card that was drawn was labeled "pathetic". Among other cards that were laid down in attempts to be similar to "pathetic" was my girlfriend's card. She won with a create-a-card labeled "My Sex Life". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 203

You deserved it 4 898

By jobless - 07/02/2010 06:12 - United States

Today, I realized after sending out countless copies of my resume to companies, I failed to add my phone number on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 263

You deserved it 31 765

Date night

By Anonymous - 10/01/2023 03:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I booked a restaurant and nice hotel for date night. We only get a few hours away from our baby, so we may as well squeeze in sexy time! I told my husband and he was more worried about the awkward early check out than excited for the sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 250

Clever boy

By Lisa87 - 21/05/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I came home to find my dog had learned how to open our fridge. He ate the birthday cake I was saving for a friend's surprise party, and to add insult to injury, he'd also apparently thrown the barely digested cake up all over my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 105

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The Top

Today, I fell down the stairs of my apartment building because I thought my cat was a ghost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 656

You deserved it 4 058

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 451

You deserved it 6 211

Today, I realized that I spend more money on gas to go to my job than what I get paid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 451

You deserved it 3 630

Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 346

You deserved it 2 669

Today, I found out why my girlfriend of 8 months has never agreed to stay the night before. Now I have a 4-month old mattress that needs replacing, and a 23-year-old bedwetter for a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 492

You deserved it 8 902

Today, I had to spend a quite considerable chunk of my Saturday on the phone to my boss explaining that no, it is not reasonable or convenient for him to try and cancel my honeymoon leave, all because he messed up the schedules, and doesn’t want to upset the other girl in the office he fancies like mad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 589

You deserved it 71