Health: Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a... - FML

By magicman - 04/07/2012 09:04 - United States

Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a ladder. To avoid bad luck, I swerved around it into the street. I got hit by a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 166

You deserved it 31 456

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Same thing different taste

Careless and carefree

By Anonymous - 12/08/2022 07:00 - Romania

Today, when I crossed the street, I almost died because of a careless driver, but when I crossed it again on my way back, I got hit by a bicycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 306

BIKES

By ihpgolj - 18/06/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 884

You deserved it 43 990

By Tequila - 20/06/2011 16:12 - Netherlands

Today, my bike abruptly stopped working, torpedoing me headfirst into the sidewalk. I lay there in agony for a few minutes, and the only guy who saw it happen said, "Lucky you didn't get hurt!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 598

You deserved it 3 219

By Lackadaisical - 15/01/2010 00:01 - United States

Today, I thought I'd be safe by looking before crossing a one way street unlike I normally do. Too bad I looked the wrong way and didn't see the car that hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 240

You deserved it 35 675

Opportunist

By Mick - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865 427

You deserved it 95 092

We meet again

By Antonin - 13/11/2020 05:03 - Switzerland

Today, I missed my bus to school, so I took my bike. The bus that I missed ignored a stop sign on its way back, making me crash into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 116

Hey there!

By Chanby - 04/05/2023 12:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I was walking down the street when I saw a friend I hadn't seen in years. I was so excited to catch up with her that I ran across the street without looking and almost got hit by a car. I ended up stumbling out of panic and landed on a pile of trash on the sidewalk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 250

You deserved it 1 058

Funny how?

By funnyguyNOT - 05/04/2009 21:39 - United States

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 319

You deserved it 285 249

Rekt

By Shaun - 16/06/2009 02:13 - United States

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 379

You deserved it 6 174

Bystander

By Chops - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking from my office to the place I had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner, I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. When I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100 355

You deserved it 4 537

Next

Top comments

drunkandfml 11

Wednesday 4 July 2012 16:43

Oh, the irony

Thisismypchere 8

Wednesday 4 July 2012 16:42

Sounds like it worked perfectly.

Comments

Moonheart13 1

Friday 6 July 2012 2:16

Guess that proves bad luck doesn't exist.

katiokos 2

Friday 6 July 2012 6:03

heres a helpful tip: luck isnt real.

jjbennett 2

Friday 6 July 2012 8:07

One way or another OUCH!!!!

kitties_fml 12

Friday 6 July 2012 18:13

Everyone knows it's only bad luck if you WALK under a ladder. oooobviously

Khariau 8

Friday 6 July 2012 22:51

Break a leg ?

eliana_101 0

Saturday 7 July 2012 7:04

What are retard

Grauncho 27

Monday 29 October 2012 8:33

Whose the real retard?

chrisllr2831 0

Wednesday 11 July 2012 19:51

You're an idiot. Superstitions get people killed. Duh, they're superstitions.

JW_SR 9

Friday 13 July 2012 20:03

Superstitious idiot!

gwg924 2

Thursday 26 July 2012 1:48

To all of the people who are saying that OP is a superstitious idiot, I counter with this: who's to say the ladder wasn't laying down on the ground?? You never know.

DiabolusIgnis 15

Monday 1 February 2016 19:38

"To avoid bad luck" Who ever heard of bad luck walking over a lying ladder, you imbecile?

Grauncho 27

Monday 29 October 2012 8:31

Serves you right for being a superstitious idiot.

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Today, I was sitting in the restaurant waiting for my blind date to come. I had sat for an hour until I finally got fed up and went to leave when at the same time the guy at the table next to me stood up to leave too. I noticed he had been sitting alone. Turns out he was my date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 481

You deserved it 2 023

Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 501

You deserved it 3 972

Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 136

You deserved it 3 274

Today, I didn't secure my friend's wheelchair well enough to my car roof before giving him a ride. It flew off mid-drive and we still haven't found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 007

You deserved it 7 199

Today, I realised just how lazy I am when I was about to masturbate, but decided not to because I didn't want to put in the effort. FML

I agree, your life sucks 921

You deserved it 1 756

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 992

You deserved it 9 622