Kids: Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so...

By Annoymous - 03/09/2009 10:19 - Australia

Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 513

You deserved it 5 816

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By jessica - 17/02/2009 23:56 - United States

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 083

You deserved it 9 539

By bbbkingsey - 23/07/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 897

You deserved it 4 376

By ViviMage - 20/07/2018 20:30

Today, while working in a blood drawing clinic, a mom sat in the chair holding her 4-year-old child, who kicked me square in the groin. Being a heavyset lady, I shrugged it off and collected the sample, while the child screamed, "Kicking worked on the last man that did this!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 902

You deserved it 400

Wham!

By Omar Khalaf - 28/09/2017 01:30

Today, when I called my 2-year-old son over for a hug, he giggled and squealed as he ran over to me. He then stopped in front of me, punched me in the bollocks, and walked away quite happily whilst I was doubled over in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 134

You deserved it 423

By Anonymous - 18/09/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 419

You deserved it 4 454

Hooligans

By Agax - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Riverside

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 962

You deserved it 4 120

By rhcp007 - 13/06/2017 17:00 - United Kingdom - Potters Bar

Today, I went to drop my little brother off at the nursery. As I walked in, a boy punched me in the dick and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 414

You deserved it 290

Run!

By Anonymous - 05/11/2011 01:21 - United States

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 812

You deserved it 37 601

By TKDConnor92 - 22/07/2011 10:51 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 676

You deserved it 6 742

Just trying to help

By Dave - 28/05/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I saw a little boy wandering in the supermarket looking lost and distraught. I gently put my hand on his shoulder and said, “Hey buddy, where’s your mommy?” He screamed, “STRANGER DANGER!” and kicked me in the shin. His actual mom wandered over from the cheese section, gave me a dirty look, and walked off. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 184

wannabesinger 16

Thursday 3 September 2009 16:37

Can you blame him? His parents probably taught him well not to talk to strangers, and here you get all up in his face. If I was him, I would've freaked out and kicked you, too. It's a shame that we have to warn our kids about things like this, but that's just how it is

justmyluck1212 0

Thursday 3 September 2009 16:16

kids aren't always sweet peaches.. FYL

Comments

AshleyRose784 0

Thursday 3 September 2009 17:29

smart kid, you're a stranger

fuckedlikeaho 0

Thursday 3 September 2009 17:47

why? what's wrong with his crotch?

leMeepO_o 0

Saturday 5 September 2009 16:38

Desperate need of Pedobear lessons.

laprincessa 0

Sunday 6 September 2009 5:50

hell yes (: sa rocks haha :D

DasHaas 9

Thursday 3 September 2009 17:35

Gotta love where this world is coming to. (More in reply to the other comments then the opening post... the kid might've just been a little brat, but considering the general opinion of people here, I doubt it.)

wingedspiritus 0

Thursday 3 September 2009 17:39

zomg Pedobear does not approve. Lack of skill, doood.

wd40 0

Thursday 3 September 2009 17:44

Pedophile much?

caitastrophe 0

Thursday 3 September 2009 18:07

stranger danger!!

foXiekatt 0

Thursday 3 September 2009 18:15

i'd say u'r a nice fellow... but maybe put ur thoughtfullness on others things that r worth it. such as on ur kids or wife/gf... etc.

Intoxicunt 5

Thursday 3 September 2009 18:16

On the bright side, I'd say you probably made his day. I would be much happier if someone let me kick them in the balls.

plexico 3

Thursday 3 September 2009 18:18

Maybe. If it's followed by a blumpkin.

Intoxicunt 5

Thursday 3 September 2009 18:32

I wonder who came up with the blumpkin idea, and what was wrong with them... I don't know, I think a good kick to some unsuspecting person's groin would do it for me. OP: To be on the safe side, though, you need to take him back to your ranch. Hey, someone has to do it since Michael Jackson bit the dust!