Health: Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work...

By ouch - 08/03/2011 15:50 - United Kingdom

Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work on skin. I decided to put this new piece of information to the test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 656

You deserved it 99 657

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Same thing different taste

By leprechaun23 - 23/04/2012 04:21 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I taught my friend how to use a staple gun. She taught me how to get staples out of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 308

You deserved it 4 322

By Anonymous - 06/07/2011 18:45 - United States

Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 289

You deserved it 79 749

By neveragain - 16/03/2012 05:11 - Canada

Today, I gave in and let my friend give me a makeover. She couldn't find my eyelash curler, but decided that if she used scissors lightly, it would work just the same. Needless to say, it did not work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 494

You deserved it 30 900

Burn!

By morningeyes - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was trying to remove a temporary tattoo my friend put on my cheek. When warm water and soap didn't work, I tried something else. Just so you know, Mr. Clean Magic Erasers do not, in fact, work by magic. Tell that to the massive chemical burn covering half my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 201

You deserved it 95 781

By wtf - 09/06/2011 15:04 - United Kingdom

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 633

You deserved it 17 985

By Anonymous - 03/06/2012 05:50 - United States - Egg Harbor Township

Today, I had an unbearable itch on my foot that I could not make go away with my nails, so I grabbed the stapler in my drawer to scratch it with. Bad idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 762

You deserved it 49 105

By 41k312 - 01/11/2016 05:03

Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 757

You deserved it 3 641

By Everest - 22/11/2018 14:00

Today, I got several thumbtacks jabbed into me. Why? Because my cousin thought it would be a funny prank to superglue a bunch of thumbtacks to his nerf darts. My left forearm is still bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 836

You deserved it 190

By BadassNinja - 05/09/2009 16:22 - United States

Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by punching through a piece of old drywall karate kid-style. As it turns out, the drywall was actually a thin piece of concrete. I now have a busted hand and a girlfriend with a new story to tell all her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 804

You deserved it 51 131

By Staples - 15/05/2010 06:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally stapled my finger to a piece of paper. It hurt, but I took it out and went to restaple it. I did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 279

You deserved it 49 110

Alleged_Cranium 7

Tuesday 8 March 2011 19:09

Since you're not using it, would you donate your brain to science? They could use it to study the null-brain.

sweet_candy_ 17

Tuesday 8 March 2011 19:08

You should have tried it on your friend.

Comments

Envy1798 2

Saturday 8 September 2012 22:40

Dumbass

bendereine 11

Thursday 11 April 2013 19:03

Dumbass.

D3ATHZ3RO 15

Friday 10 May 2013 17:51

You are an whole new level of stupid....

stimpy12 5

Friday 17 May 2013 8:50

you deserve it

BeautyBaby099 18

Saturday 7 September 2013 19:33

YDI for being a moron.

juicyfresh 7

Sunday 16 February 2014 21:41

please remove yourself from the gene pool, for the good of mankind.

owencgray 10

Friday 11 April 2014 3:15

I guess you could say that he nailed it

theoneandonlybro 18

Sunday 7 December 2014 6:27

You deserved that

AngryAmerican 18

Wednesday 4 February 2015 19:14

Do. Not. Breed. I. Repeat. Do. Not. Breed. You are retarded.

whycantisignup 24

Tuesday 10 March 2015 1:36

You are an idiot.

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend asked me if I wanted to move out. Excited, thinking he wanted us to move out from his mom's house, I said, "Yeah! Just you and me?" to which he smirked and replied, "No, just you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 423

You deserved it 5 195

Today, I overheard my fourteen year old daughter talking on the phone. Apparently, as of last night, she and her best friend have their "official licenses in muff diving". FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 863

You deserved it 4 705

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 657

You deserved it 38 149

Today, I had an asthma attack while walking home with my friends. As I was struggling to breathe, they thought I was attention-seeking and left me on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 116

You deserved it 110

Today, my teenage daughter faked a suicide because I bought her a Samsung instead of an iPhone for her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 797

You deserved it 13 366

Today, I ran into an old coworker. Several years ago, he had a creepy, obsessive crush on me. Now, he's lost over a hundred pounds, makes over twice as much as me, and isn't a complete weirdo anymore. I asked him if he wanted to get a drink sometime and 'catch up'. "Nah, I'm good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 3 444

Same thing different taste

Burn!

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