Intimacy: Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it...

By Username - 20/06/2011 15:57 - United States

Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 707

You deserved it 4 267

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Same thing different taste

Excuse me

By Anonymous - 30/03/2015 10:30 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 361

You deserved it 3 806

Family Matters

By whyme102008 - 13/07/2011 06:32 - United States

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 152 168

You deserved it 8 679

Whatcha do when they come for you?

By Anonymous - 22/01/2011 20:20 - United States

Today, my girlfriend called me to pick her up from jail. She'd been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 920

You deserved it 4 389

Dumbasses

By stay in there - 17/04/2020 23:00

Today, I got a call from the local police station. Apparently, my idiot son and his equally dumb girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to have sex in the car at a park in broad daylight. They assumed no one would be there due to the quarantine. They were wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 297

You deserved it 320

Caught

By fuck - 09/11/2013 23:30 - United States - Hubert

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 470

You deserved it 5 285

By GoldenTornado11 - 10/05/2017 14:00

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 203

You deserved it 569

Caught in 4K

By RBergman - 25/04/2015 20:05 - United States - Basin

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 883

You deserved it 3 370

Fun times

By Anonymous - 16/03/2020 23:01

Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 2 451

By Anonymous - 15/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Bronx

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 593

You deserved it 5 065

Pranked!

By RetroDayDreamer - 10/09/2011 15:46 - United States

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 476

You deserved it 28 912

greg1234567890_fml 2

Monday 20 June 2011 19:01

whose bush was it?

green_eggs_and_h 0

Monday 20 June 2011 19:03

At least you know your parents still love eachother.

Comments

642_fml 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:31

Hah tjeres nothing wrong doing it behind a bushh hah:)

starsfan_9 7

Monday 20 June 2011 21:16

Agreed, the inconsiderate thing to do would've been to do it in front of the bush

greatwyt 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:31

perverts are fine :) at least they not gay

i_love_life121 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:34

wait... that's not okay?

mismonroe 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:50

You mean.. it's not ok..?

HahaYDI 0

Monday 20 June 2011 20:56

Good thing a police officer found them before they ran into a wild Pokemon. Those bushes are full of them.

iwuvwoo 7

Monday 20 June 2011 21:09

well, at least your parents love eachother. 

Sunny_Eclipse 6

Monday 20 June 2011 21:11

Nice parents. I hope they haven't screwed up your life much.

marcyfrances 4

Monday 20 June 2011 21:11

well be glad they still like eachother!!!!

Khathia21 0

Monday 20 June 2011 21:11

That's hilarious...sorry that it happened to you though!!!

starsfan_9 7

Monday 20 June 2011 21:14

some peoples children eh?

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The Top

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I'm already a clumsy person but became extra clumsy because I was nervous. After knocking over my drink for the fourth time, my boyfriend's mom angrily shouted "Did you actually come drunk for the first time meeting us?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 389

You deserved it 9 489

Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 122

Today, my mom spelled my name with all lowercase letters. When I asked her why she wrote it like that, she got pissed and snapped back, "Capitals are for people who amount to something." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 618

You deserved it 3 790

Today, I went in to get a sub sandwich. I asked the guy behind the counter if he could please put extra pickles on it. He looked at my stomach, and then put a huge handful of them on. I'm not pregnant, just fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 820

You deserved it 267

Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 266

You deserved it 32 766

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 902

You deserved it 5 196

Same thing different taste

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