Intimacy: Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try...

By SwinginSolo - 26/03/2013 12:07 - United States

Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try swinging" is "I really want to have sex with this one friend of yours, and if you so much as make eye contact with any guy I'm going to totally flip out and threaten to kill him and you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 914

You deserved it 7 215

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

Hey good lookin'

By Anonymous - 18/07/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, a "friend" mentioned that my husband was "yummy", then asked if she could "have a turn" with him. I left and went home, outraged. When I told my husband, he couldn't conceal his stupid horny grin, and immediately tried to initiate sex. Pig. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 698

Nice try, Dave

By wtf Homer? - 21/04/2021 00:30

Today, my husband’s been dropping hints he wants to open our marriage. When I got home, a couple of his coworkers dropped by "for drinks". They tried to initiate group sex and figured I just needed to be talked into it. I was so mad, I couldn’t throw everyone out fast enough, including him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 265

You deserved it 210

Needs and desires

By Yeah, no. - 28/11/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I found out my husband is a cuck. After explaining that I'm not exactly satisfied in the bedroom, we were thinking of ideas to spice things up. I suggested buying a few toys he could use on me. He immediately got mad, because he wanted me to find other men to screw instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 546

You deserved it 172

Unreasonable

By ImConfused - 29/05/2023 00:02

Today, my husband demanded I delete all my male friends/contacts except family members. All this because I texted one of my male friends, “Happy Birthday! Hope you have a good one.” According to him, “One thing leads to another then next thing you know you both are in bed fucking like rabbits.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 513

You deserved it 304

Maddening

By ballnchain - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my insanely jealous wife flipped out and made me promise never to hug any of my female friends or go to lunch with them, ever. It's "cheating." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 934

You deserved it 20 121

Cruisin' for a bruisin'

By Anonymous - 17/06/2023 15:00

Today, I showed my best friend proof that her husband was sexually harassing me. Now she's refusing to talk to me, and I can't let my own husband out of my sight, for fear that he's going to murder the guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 155

You deserved it 140

Hiding something?

By Carolina - 16/08/2023 14:00

Today, my husband threw an epic tantrum about how “men are allowed to have female friends”, smashed stuff in the living room, for him to storm out and slam the door, making the house tremble. All I did was tell him that his friendship with his secretary made me uncomfortable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 225

Strange dynamic

By Anonymous - 15/11/2021 01:59

Today, my husband has been texting women to see if he can go out on a date with one of them, just because I’ve befriended his friend and apparently, the movie and food I got with the friend was a first date, so now he wants to get even. FML

I agree, your life sucks 718

You deserved it 2 339

By Irrationalwife - 31/03/2019 00:00

Today, my husband and I got into a fight about his pervert friend who regularly shows blatant disrespect for our marriage, including sending me inappropriate texts. Apparently this friend should have my full trust, and apparently I am the one with the issue for not excusing his bad behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 474

You deserved it 233

Spice it up

By Jan - 13/10/2025 20:00

Today, my husband came home, threw me over his shoulder, and carried me to the bedroom. Furious, I shrieked to be put down and demanded an explanation. He said, "I thought you wanted us to be more spontaneous…" Apparently, that means he should treat me like a sex toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 730

LovesSushi 25

Tuesday 26 March 2013 16:05

Well that sounds healthy...

obnum 19

Tuesday 26 March 2013 16:05

...what? He sounds like a terrible person

Comments

BriannaRWatson 13

Tuesday 26 March 2013 18:23

If you were going to swing then why'd you get married? Not being mean, just curious. Second of all, don't walk. Run away. Or get him some therapy.

crammer1 6

Tuesday 26 March 2013 19:24

I've known a lot of people that agreed to swinging to make their partner happy. Some believe it's better to have an agreement and not get lied to, than to have someone do it behind your back. I Can't say I've ever seen it have a good outcome, except for with older more established couples that have been together for years. Not my cup of tea though.

jambupapoy 5

Tuesday 26 March 2013 18:40

I feel just as bad for the next man you look at.

heyijustmetu 7

Tuesday 26 March 2013 18:45

threaten him that you will cut his man hood if he even dares to think about that happening

Dracoboxer357 35

Tuesday 26 March 2013 19:08

79- You advise Op to start uttering idle threats back at this lunatic, after he offered to Kill her for Glancing at another man? Somehow, I don't see that ending well.... :p

ardencred 7

Tuesday 26 March 2013 18:50

Swinging? That sounds more like cheating!!

panda_lou 11

Tuesday 26 March 2013 18:58

A lot of people go in to swinging with a theory in their head about how it is going to work. They don't take in to account that their emotions may not be able to handle it. Perhaps he went in thinking he would be okay but actually seeing his wife with another man just made him flip shit. Hopefully they both left and neither did anything with another person and are happy being with each other. If however he has just being a douche and trying to get permission to cheat then you need to be aware that he may still cheat on you without permission. You need to visit a therapist together to work out what's going on. Otherwise I'd seriously evaluate if you want to stay in a marriage like this.

mrstriance94 8

Tuesday 26 March 2013 19:35

Ditch him immediately! Clearly doesn't love you if he's off looking for something new....

Chigal88 16

Tuesday 26 March 2013 19:42

Shocker! Lol I have a policy when I'm dating someone that "open" means both parties are free to see others. As a general rule since I trust the men I'm dating I practice don't ask don't tell.