Spooked

By fucking mafia or what?? - 12/01/2013 22:02 - United States - Marysville

Today, I opened my front door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 022
You deserved it 3 464

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Comments

robo_thunder 13

My first thought was that you're one of those owners who don't pick up after their dogs and someone was just returning it to you.

Leave your own shit on the doorstep with a note saying "I don't know who you are, or what you want, but there's plenty more where this came from." :]

Why would OP leave their own shit on their own doorstep? What purpose does that serve?

Anyone else picture Liam Neeson saying this while on the telephone?...

Facetiously, as a message to the instigator, who would probably return, since OP doesn't know why said person is so angry. But good job for thinking so literally! The world needs more close minded thinkers like you!

Did you let your dog poop on someone's lawn, and not pick it up?

If so, they probably would have found the bag of poop tied to a brick that came through their window. At least, I would hope.

Kallian_fml 21

60- Why contain the poop in a bag? I'd throw the brick first, then fling the poo through the whole in the window. That way you get to hear that satisfying splat.

Kallian_fml 21

*hole. Damn, how did I miss that before?

Can I just say how much I love your name? Lol

No, you cannot. But since you have already, there was really no point in asking now, was there?

This is why you should never steal from orphans, they are friends with all the stray animals.

that just sucks but at least it wasn't on fire haha

Why did this guy tape the letter to the ground when he has a perfectly good pile of dog shit for a paper weight?