Intimacy: OMG

OMG

By At least she knows I floss - 25/08/2017 14:15 - United States - Pomona

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents and everything was going perfectly. He and I even had some time alone upstairs, where I gave him a blowjob. After dinner, his mom helpfully pointed out something stuck in my braces and inspected it for me. It was a pube. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 503

You deserved it 5 375

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Tyler - 19/11/2011 08:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 262

You deserved it 34 533

By pleasedtomeetyou - 13/01/2010 16:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I met my boyfriend's notoriously difficult mother. I had been looking forward to meeting her and making a good impression. Unfortunately, I could not greet her as her son's penis was still in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 171

You deserved it 16 394

By gjh - 19/01/2009 03:20 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 888

You deserved it 13 414

Knock next time please

By Anonymous - 09/11/2020 21:32 - India

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 826

Scolded

By oopsies - 08/01/2010 01:07 - United States

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 101

You deserved it 5 478

Banjo starts playing in the background

By unknown - 09/11/2010 02:25 - United States

Today, I met my boyfriend's whole family. Between them they had about 10 teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 242

You deserved it 5 181

By anonymous - 04/11/2014 12:03 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 272

You deserved it 8 513

By Ilovelife07 - 19/09/2009 04:47 - United States

Today, I went out to lunch on my break. When I got back to work, I noticed I had something in my teeth. After trying to get it out with my tongue, I finally went to my car for some floss. I ended up pulling a 4 inch pube out of my back teeth. It certainly wasn't mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 733

You deserved it 9 598

Hand shandy

By cdoyle - 08/04/2009 12:32 - Canada

Today, I went to dinner with my boyfriend. After we'd ordered, I started to unzip his fly really slowly. As I put my hand into his boxers, he stood up to greet his mom and dad who were joining us for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 527

You deserved it 110 746

You what?

By charliesangel123 - 21/02/2010 17:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I was waiting downstairs at my boyfriend's house as he got ready to go. His mom came over and said she was so glad her son had met me, that I made him really happy. I smiled thinking how nice that was of her to say. She then continued, "Still, he tells me anal is a no?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 553

You deserved it 3 731

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Saturday 26 August 2017 1:06

Wow, great first impression. Hope she didn't realize what it was. Still, if you just met them, you should have respected their house more. At least wait until the fifth time you're at their house...

gobiteme2 34

Friday 25 August 2017 23:40

Should have looked her in the eye and said dessert was great.

Comments

thatslifeiguess7 16

Saturday 26 August 2017 16:23

Braces and sex st his parents house... how old are you 12?

dangerouszombie 8

Sunday 27 August 2017 0:23

You have no idea, my best friend is 24 and she has braces. Don't judge about shit you don't know!

thatslifeiguess7 16

Sunday 27 August 2017 0:28

I meant more the parents house is something a 12 year old would do

jkjorn 16

Monday 28 August 2017 15:43

I got mine at 32 (and had them for 4 years!) Never had insurance with orthodontic coverage, so had to wait until I could afford it on my own. It happens.