Intimacy Giving and taking

Giving and taking

patriarchal apparently - 29/06/2013 19:58 - Saint Lucia

Today, my girlfriend kicked me out for bringing up the idea of her maybe giving me a blowjob someday. According to her, it's "demeaning" and "sick". She doesn't seem to have a problem always making me go down on her for ages as a condition for having sex with me, though. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Miscommunication

Anonymous - 25/10/2012 05:45 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

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Hidden

bootyislife - 16/06/2015 20:01 - United States - Lynnwood

Today, my girlfriend made me put a blanket over my head while giving me a blowjob because she didn't like the faces I was making. FML

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Bored

Taylor parsons - 29/10/2010 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML

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Double standard

NoSexForMe - 13/07/2014 07:46 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

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Finger wagging

Anonymous - 16/12/2024 14:00 - United States - Edison

Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML

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That escalated badly

Anonymous - 19/03/2020 09:03

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

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The pleasure, the pain

BadBribe - 24/06/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me a blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML

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In training

Anonymous - 13/12/2023 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend loves giving blowjobs; the problem is she is very bad at them, refuses to admit she is bad at them, and cries and stops talking to me every time I try and tell her how to do it better. My knob is red and sore where she keeps catching it with her teeth. FML

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Anonymous - 30/12/2015 15:21 - Canada - Aurora

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob. It felt like she was skinning my dick alive with her teeth. I had to pretend to finish myself off in the bathroom and tell her it was because I didn't want her to have to swallow. FML

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Fragile

HashiManGo - 02/09/2022 14:00

Today, my girlfriend's bastard ex whispered in my ear that, "she used to suck my cock with that mouth, think about that the next time she tries to kiss you." Now it's all I can picture every time she kisses me, and it's lowkey disgusting, and turns me off. FML

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wootwootimahoot 10

Sunday 30 June 2013 2:18

Hypocrite.

Grand_Cookie 21

Sunday 30 June 2013 2:22

Sack up and stop doing it for her. Two can play that game.

bosniangirl27 21

Saturday 7 February 2015 3:12

Dump her

SmEarth 5

Friday 13 February 2015 1:02

Well that isn't fair at all

iwusinger47 2

Friday 24 April 2015 17:23

no way sharing is caring. You have to give to get in return, imo

Baron_Kaz 15

Monday 20 July 2015 8:03

Time to upgrade!

1karls1 8

Wednesday 22 July 2015 3:23

SAY THAY TO HER THE NEXT TIME SHE ASKS YOU TO GO DOWN ON HER

Ideastogetback 11

Thursday 24 December 2015 18:04

From what I've heard, a generally flesh tasting rod is better than a hole that smells and tastes like the air in a fish market .

TheRealStunts 27

Wednesday 13 April 2016 9:29

So you give her head but she thinks her giving you head would be sick and demeaning... Stop giving her head and just tell her the same thing if she asks. ******* hypocrite