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YAY! i like bears & rats ;^3

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Healthaccount's favorite FMLs

By caroline - 06/02/2009 15:29 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML

agreeclassic 802

vote type 1 57

By MakeMyDay_27 - 27/06/2011 16:46 - United States

Today, my daughter told me that my head is shaped like a kidney bean and that I'm lucky she even talks to me in public. She's 6. FML

agreeclassic 43 966

vote type 1 5 642

By footfood - 27/06/2011 14:56 - Slovenia

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend eat the dead skin from the soles of her feet. FML

agreeclassic 74 390

vote type 1 7 728

I'm a rebel, mom!

By SheenaL - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my son is going through a rebellious phase. He's taken to wearing leather and chains, listening to death metal music all day in his room alone, and screaming at me in public places. He was fired from his part-time job for swearing at customers. My son is 29 years old. FML

agreeclassic 48 240

vote type 1 13 926

By Anonymous - 26/06/2011 06:12 - United States

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

agreeclassic 44 623

vote type 1 17 096