vampgirl11295

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40 years-old
Saturday 02 November 1985
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Vampgirl11295's favorite FMLs

By Danny - 07/01/2012 10:27 - Australia

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

agreeclassic 23 815

vote type 1 44 348

By Anonymous - 28/12/2011 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

agreeclassic 34 866

vote type 1 23 606

By anonymous - 24/09/2011 15:22 - United States

Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML

agreeclassic 28 423

vote type 1 4 723

By cj123 - 23/12/2011 08:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for breathing too much. FML

agreeclassic 31 524

vote type 1 5 491

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By kaipodable - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that I can no longer sleep over at his house because his cat doesn't like it. FML

agreeclassic 33 768

vote type 1 4 662