darth_nova

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Oregon City, USA
37 years-old
Saturday 11 June 1988
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A propos de Darth_nova

I lost The Game

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Darth_nova's favorite FMLs

Excuses

By sucks - 12/03/2009 17:53 - United States

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very Christian family, I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "Is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" FML

agreeclassic 295 680

vote type 1 54 195

By f*ckingdisgusted - 27/08/2011 01:13 - United States

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

agreeclassic 34 709

vote type 1 56 866

By Anonymous - 26/08/2011 17:49 - United States

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

agreeclassic 37 746

vote type 1 6 147

New laws

By Andrew - 23/08/2011 14:46 - United States

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

agreeclassic 36 253

vote type 1 6 414

Put it all back

By WTFwhywouldyoudothat - 22/08/2011 22:10 - United Kingdom

Today, my house got broken into. Thankfully, they didn't steal anything. They did, however, move things around into strange places and mess up my underwear. I have severe OCD, so this is probably worse than if they had taken everything. FML

agreeclassic 32 103

vote type 1 4 384