TECHEM

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Techem's favorite FMLs

I'd like to thank…

By Jessey - 18/06/2009 13:05 - United Kingdom

Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they'd actually called up. FML

agreeclassic 23 812

vote type 1 47 952

Rushed

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

agreeclassic 21 673

vote type 1 44 772

Cosy chat

By sick and awkward - 20/05/2012 06:11 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML

agreeclassic 32 380

vote type 1 3 590

By mitchell904 - 18/04/2012 23:51 - United Kingdom - Newport

Today, I was issued with a £60 fine for being parked in a supermarket car-park for more than 3 hours. I work there. FML

agreeclassic 27 354

vote type 1 2 479

mitchell904 app_comment_confession_title

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Thursday 19 April 2012 10:53

I will definitely be fighting it! There's no way I'll pay it. The reason I got the fine is because the car park management is outsourced to another company, and they've just switched to an automated system which identifies the registration number of the cars when entering and leaving. Whilst I have a little permit sticker on my windscreen - which has been fine for the past 2 years - the system doesn't see it. Needless to say I'll be going in to speak to someone today... And walking.

By Anonymous - 12/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Rock Island

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

agreeclassic 17 997

vote type 1 39 935