dollylonglegs

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Dollylonglegs's favorite FMLs

Stop right there

By wtfmama - 04/05/2013 12:51 - United States - Hudson

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

agreeclassic 74 204

vote type 1 11 254

Huge fan

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Acworth

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair in a way that it looks like Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

agreeclassic 67 910

vote type 1 10 448

By Aaronator25 - 17/04/2013 04:07 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I admitted to my parents that I'm a pathological liar and I would like to go get help. They didn't believe me, and told me stop making stuff up. FML

agreeclassic 46 163

vote type 1 7 131

Aaronator25 app_comment_confession_title

Aaronator25 7

Wednesday 17 April 2013 15:13

Hey guys this is OP, you probably wont believe me, but hey that'd make me a liar so... Im still trying to convince my parents of this so i can see a professional...

Awkward pause

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Blue Springs

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

agreeclassic 48 510

vote type 1 17 925

By ShadowBox - 12/03/2013 16:43 - Netherlands - Herveld

Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML

agreeclassic 38 664

vote type 1 5 635

ShadowBox app_comment_confession_title

ShadowBox 8

Monday 1 July 2013 8:37

I still tend to have weird dreams like these occasionally, except now they're less Romantic-Comedy, more Saw. -_- On the bright side, I did meet someone a few weeks ago ^.^ Nothing official but we're getting there.