Kids, Relatable, Spiders and Phobias: Wonky fear

Wonky fear

By mala_19 - 27/08/2023 08:00 - Sweden - Burea

Today, I saw a spider. My two year-old knows that I'm afraid of them, but in an attempt to not pass my phobia onto him, I said it was a piece of dirt. Now he thinks that I'm afraid of dirt. I did not think this through. FML

agreeclassic 215

vote type 1 637

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You big fanny

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 17:57 - Germany - Hagen

Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML

agreeclassic 12 437

vote type 1 31 307

By JustLeaveThem - 25/01/2017 18:00

Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML

agreeclassic 2 752

vote type 1 301

By Arachnaphobe - 03/06/2016 22:14 - United States - Bloomington

Today, a large spider climbed inside my lunchbox while my mom was making me sandwiches. She didn't tell me about it until after I got home from school, though, and only because I mentioned a strange aftertaste in the sandwiches. She said she didn't want me to worry over lunch because she knows I hate spiders. FML

agreeclassic 13 556

vote type 1 1 071

My finest hour

By Anonymous - 04/05/2024 06:00 - Canada

Today, I finally conquered my fear of spiders by catching one in a cup and releasing it outside. Feeling proud of my bravery, I proudly showed my accomplishment to my roommate, only to realize it wasn't a spider but a piece of lint. I screamed louder than I would have for a spider. FML

agreeclassic 317

vote type 1 208

By ihatespiders - 05/08/2014 12:31 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I asked my 8-year-old daughter to kill a house spider for me. I am a 42-year-old man. FML

agreeclassic 40 833

vote type 1 18 868

She's right, you know

By Anonymous - 27/07/2009 16:52 - United Kingdom

Today, I was babysitting some kids and helping them make a poster about insects. They couldn't think of any more insects to add so I suggested a spider, and got told to "not be a dumbass, spiders aren't insects they're arachnids." The girl is six. FML

agreeclassic 19 933

vote type 1 56 011

Adapt, improvise, overcome

By Arthur B. - 24/09/2019 12:01

Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML

agreeclassic 1 364

vote type 1 469

Leave spiders to chill

By Anonymous - 17/12/2020 14:07

Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML

agreeclassic 746

vote type 1 334

Irrational fears

By emelie000 - 29/07/2022 14:00

Today, my daughter, who can pick up spiders and even snakes without flinching, screamed at the top of her lungs because she saw a mouse. Um, what? FML

agreeclassic 660

vote type 1 210

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

agreeclassic 73 348

vote type 1 7 657

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Today, my acne reached a new low. Literally. I'm now getting bright red pimples on my penis. FML

agreeclassic 21 814

vote type 1 2 851

Today, I was sitting at a traffic light when a cute girl appeared at the side of the road. I sat and watched her until she had crossed, when I realised that I had missed the light. A large queue of cars had built up behind me, yet none of them used their horn because I was driving my police car. FML

agreeclassic 9 603

vote type 1 54 295

Today, my sister asked me if she could go into my closet to borrow my favourite dress for a party she was going to tonight. When I asked her where she was going, she said to a Halloween costume party. My sister is going as a prostitute. FML

agreeclassic 12 038

vote type 1 31 787

Today, I saw a man lying on the street. He seemed unconscious, so, being a nurse I went over and found he had choked. I removed the object from his throat and used CPR to revive him. My reward? A mouthful of vomit. FML

agreeclassic 43 694

vote type 1 5 211

Today, my nephew grabbed my balls to wake me up at 4 AM. FML

agreeclassic 1 797

vote type 1 176

Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML

agreeclassic 34 158

vote type 1 3 216