Fire and Kids: Twisted firestarter

Twisted firestarter

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML

agreeclassic 33 477

vote type 1 5 883

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By failure as a parent - 11/05/2013 21:19 - United States - Bound Brook

Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML

agreeclassic 54 438

vote type 1 6 295

By oh dear - 25/10/2009 09:06 - France

Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML

agreeclassic 44 338

vote type 1 5 180

By ILiveWithMorons - 12/04/2011 03:07 - United States

Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML

agreeclassic 34 404

vote type 1 3 346

By Anonymous - 02/03/2010 21:16 - United States

Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML

agreeclassic 30 286

vote type 1 2 683

By Anonymous - 25/01/2013 18:00 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my daughter tried to cover up her relapse into pyromania by explaining to me that the reason our carpet caught on fire was because a hot coal somehow worked its way free from the fireplace. Our fireplace is electric. FML

agreeclassic 31 595

vote type 1 2 586

By Anonymous - 28/03/2015 04:39 - United States - Madison

Today, my pyromaniac sister somehow got her hands on my dad's lighter and set my bed sheets on fire. My dad said I must have provoked her, and that she can't be blamed for her mental condition. So now I'm grounded, and she has a new doll house to calm her down. FML

agreeclassic 35 758

vote type 1 2 437

By kaycie_lynn - 19/02/2010 01:11 - United States

Today, I chuckled at a "No Smoking" sign as I lit my cigarette. I bent my head down to light it and somehow managed to light my hair on fire. FML

agreeclassic 6 777

vote type 1 71 641

By Anonymous - 06/01/2015 16:40 - Vietnam - Ho Chi Minh City

Today, at a candlelit dinner, I accidentally set my dad's leg on fire. FML

agreeclassic 29 639

vote type 1 4 706

By wah wah "you raised him" - 22/04/2014 18:59 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

agreeclassic 41 815

vote type 1 5 270

By :| - 26/09/2015 04:10 - New Zealand - Nelson

Today, my 6-year-old daughter touched a tray I'd just pulled out of the oven. I quickly swatted her hand away, but then noticed she wasn't hurt or burned at all. I then gingerly touched the tray and got scalded. My daughter giggled maniacally as I screamed. To be honest, I'm now terrified of her. FML

agreeclassic 29 743

vote type 1 4 280

jlt93 0

Monday 1 August 2011 12:16

And your daughter is how old?

Jacobt24 19

Monday 1 August 2011 12:18

That wasn't a good hiding place to start with. It's not even hidden.

Comments

koverton91 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 9:10

I would beat that kids ASS

rakuboi 3

Tuesday 2 August 2011 17:16

I hope someone called the police, that's ridiculous.

NextBigThing5044 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 7:39

She try to kill mommy.

_Allstar_ 2

Thursday 4 August 2011 3:54

Note to self......hid lighters from children in order to prevent burnt hair....literally. I think that keeping lighters away from kids should be a warning they put in bold letter on lighters these days because having your hair on fire doesnt seem fun :)