Intimacy: Today, It was my birthday and my friends came to celebrate it....

By AMIGODO - 12/02/2011 15:13 - Netherlands

Today, It was my birthday and my friends came to celebrate it. My parents thought it would be funny to give me a vibrator in front of everybody. FML

agreeclassic 38 891

vote type 1 5 126

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Today, my boyfriend bought me a vibrator for my birthday. Sounds sweet, right? Then he invited my 10/14-year-old cousins to our house. They surprised me in my room. While I was using it. FML

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By Nothingonyou - 08/09/2010 07:35 - France

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By TeeJay - 01/06/2009 14:06 - United States

Today, it was my birthday, and my wife gave me a sex toy for self-masturbation. She even showed me how to properly use it so I can masturbate myself. FML

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By silvercity09 - 26/05/2009 03:04 - Canada

Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML

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By mylifesucks - 18/04/2009 07:20 - Netherlands

Today, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My boyfriend of almost 3 years gave me a big pink vibrator. Thinking it was a joke I said: "I won't need this as long as I have you!" His reply: "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." FML

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By Killme - 13/07/2016 02:10

Today, as a birthday present, my friends threw a surprise party for me. I was so surprised, I pissed myself in front of everyone, including my crush. FML

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By Brittany - 10/04/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, my boyfriend's friends were throwing him a surprise birthday party. I thought it'd be funny to get him some fuzzy handcuffs and a box of condoms as a gift. They never told me they invited his parents. FML

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The hair of the dog

By Anonymous - 20/06/2024 16:00 - Australia

Today, my friends threw me a surprise birthday party. I was genuinely surprised—and also genuinely hungover from celebrating my birthday alone the night before because they'd all told me they were busy. FML

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Cool story, tell it again

By GGimabeast - 29/07/2010 04:14 - United States

Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML

agreeclassic 34 479

vote type 1 12 431

By PmS - 08/03/2009 07:16 - United States

Today, it's my birthday, and I was going over to my friend's house for dinner. When I walked in, everyone yelled, "Surprise!" and then turned on the lights. When my friend looked over at me, she said, "Wrong person guys, turn off the lights." FML

agreeclassic 61 657

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nickinak2010 4

Saturday 12 February 2011 20:02

they were right, it is funny.

capnbzarr 43

Saturday 12 February 2011 20:11

Yes, they were right; that's hilarious. For my friend's 18th birthday, I gave him porno. His mom thought it was a lot funnier than he did.

Comments

MothsWings 4

Saturday 2 July 2011 0:17

Wow...opposite than usual.

ThisRandomChild 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 19:45

Lol screw your sense of humor, u need to get out more often, cause thats f*¢kin funny!

writergirl23 19

Friday 5 August 2011 23:06

Was it ur 18th

katieskatergirl 0

Wednesday 29 February 2012 21:17

What's the fml?!?

jdm_powered 6

Tuesday 4 December 2012 18:13

Score!

greenm3lly 4

Sunday 19 May 2013 16:22

You're parents are cool people lol

HatemyLife32 15

Saturday 21 September 2013 8:50

You should give your mom one for her birthday

homes7d 14

Monday 4 November 2013 22:18

Hay at least you got a new sex toy enjoy

syed121417 22

Friday 31 January 2014 1:23

Dude I would be happy, not embarrassed

Szaszaspasz 26

Tuesday 24 February 2015 3:32

I hit the wrong button... Sorry

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Keywords

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my five year-old niece thought that it would be acceptable to carve her artwork all over our toilet seat. FML

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Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML

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Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML

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