Love: Today, in order to avoid seeing my ex-girlfriend in class, I...

By fatcat117 - 22/04/2011 01:53 - United States

Today, in order to avoid seeing my ex-girlfriend in class, I changed my schedule for "personal reasons." Apparently she had the same idea and changed her schedule as well. We now have all the same classes together. Before, we had just two. FML

agreeclassic 35 392

vote type 1 9 789

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By Uh oh... - 19/03/2011 08:45 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of almost two years and I broke up. Earlier, we scheduled our classes for senior year to match perfectly. Can't wait. FML

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By jacques - 02/02/2010 14:08 - Australia

Today, I ran into my ex's family, and found out they are going to Europe. Funnily enough, so am I. Even funnier is the fact that we are going on the same date, at the same time, on the same flights, and the tour starts on the same day in the same place. FML

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By not_this_shit_again - 09/04/2014 12:37 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I had to show a new student around my school. Normally, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, but the student was my crazy, overly-attached ex. I transferred schools to get away from her in the first place. FML

agreeclassic 48 014

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By sadex - 09/03/2015 07:52

Today, I got the earlier bus to avoid my ex after a painful breakup. He had the same idea. FML

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It wasn't me

By Anon - this FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Modesto

Today, I got detention at school because a girl told the principal I was stalking her on campus. I wasn't stalking her, we just have very similar schedules. FML

agreeclassic 26 517

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By Anonymous - 04/12/2010 01:09 - United States

Today, I found a schedule in my dorm room that I share with three other guys. Looking at it closer I realized it was my schedule with notes written in all around it. My roommates have planned their entire days around mine so we won't have any interaction at all. I thought we got along great. FML

agreeclassic 27 737

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Fresh start, sort of…

By robbed - 02/09/2023 22:00

Today, my ex-girlfriend from high school has been at her new college for a week. She broke up with me because she wanted to meet new people and leave high school behind her. That was understandable… until my best friend showed me texts from her trying to arrange to hook up with him when she’s back. FML

agreeclassic 756

vote type 1 109

Wrong target

By footinmouth - 21/01/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I was hitting on a girl who was getting ready to walk into the same class as me. We were waiting outside the room, so I told her that I'd heard the professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down at a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML

agreeclassic 11 923

vote type 1 38 885

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 08:13 - United States

Today, after some filing mistakes, and a lot of waiting on hold, I'm finally registered for Spring classes. I was ready to enjoy this term, until I found out that my ex, who was forced into therapy after he threatened to kill me, is in half of my classes. FML

agreeclassic 32 654

vote type 1 2 763

By Betrayed - 27/08/2012 06:11 - United States

Today, I attended my college roommate's wedding. We were best friends for 4 years, but have only talked occasionally since graduation. I was looking forward to meeting her new husband, having heard so much about him during our conversations. Turns out she forgot to mention he's my ex. FML

agreeclassic 30 218

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docscientist 9

Friday 22 April 2011 8:31

r-i-g-h-t.

this_female 0

Friday 22 April 2011 8:27

-__- grow up .

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paddymac 13

Tuesday 19 January 2016 5:00

Why did you change all of them?

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Today, I made a homemade face mask with turmeric, honey, lemon, and a few other organic ingredients. I let the mixture sit, then washed it off. It stained my face so bright yellow I look like I’m either suffering from a terrible case of jaundice or auditing for a live action Simpson’s movie. FML

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Today, I got turned down by my dream job because their rival company happens to be called my exact name. I'm now known as "The Spy". FML

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Today, my wife is upset at me for having to remind her of her responsibilities. She dropped the ball several times in the past, and she hates that I remind her to prepare for upcoming deadlines. FML

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Today, my water broke. Due to Covid-19, we couldn't go straight to labor and delivery, so had to go to the emergency room and wait to be taken up. I sat there for an hour with a ruptured sac and contractions. FML

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Today, a customer complained he never got his sandwich, even though I put it in the oven, dressed it up and served it to him. When I went to clear his table off, I saw the sandwich basket. We had to give him his money back. FML

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Today, I got out of bed and went downstairs in my boxers to get a glass of water. I entered the kitchen and said hi to my visiting mother-in-law, who smiled. Only after a good ten minutes did she decide to tell me that my knob was hanging from a gap in my boxers. FML

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