Geek: Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and...

By dwhite032 - 06/06/2011 07:06 - United States

Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML

agreeclassic 38 503

vote type 1 6 852

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By fuckMYlife94321 - 26/04/2009 16:21 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML

agreeclassic 63 882

vote type 1 13 762

By pillowless - 13/10/2011 14:41 - United States

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. The items stolen were my PS3, cell phone, laptop, tablets, and for some reason my deodorant and pillowcases as well. FML

agreeclassic 29 988

vote type 1 2 415

By wheatsnake - 08/10/2009 13:31 - Australia

Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML

agreeclassic 39 193

vote type 1 2 825

Thanks for all your help

By jruth7 - 15/05/2011 04:49 - United States

Today, after being in Europe for a month, I got home to find my door wide open and all my stuff gone. I called my dad who was supposed to be watching my house. He told me I should have had someone check on my place while I was gone. FML

agreeclassic 41 047

vote type 1 3 703

Help yourself

By Anonymous - 22/11/2014 21:08 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I woke up, only to find my Xbox missing. Thankfully I have a security camera discreetly wired up in the tree on my lawn. Checking the tapes, I saw my brother park outside my house, let himself in with his spare key, then drive off with my missing equipment. FML

agreeclassic 35 352

vote type 1 2 980

By BedazzledAlpaca - 08/12/2014 05:03 - United States - Englewood

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to find that I had slept through my house getting robbed. FML

agreeclassic 34 868

vote type 1 4 314

By Anonymous - 18/01/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I arrived at my apartment to find the door kicked in. Inside, I found my TV, Xbox, stereo, CDs, and laptop had all been stolen. When my roommate got home, I told him about it, to which he replied, "Yeah, I left my keys inside this morning, so I kicked the door in to get them." He'd left, leaving the door kicked in. FML

agreeclassic 36 478

vote type 1 2 566

By jccwell - 23/09/2011 16:50 - United States

Today, my dad called, saying he was in town and that he wanted to see me. I was excited, thinking he wanted to come see my new apartment. Turns out he just wanted to borrow my Xbox. FML

agreeclassic 27 112

vote type 1 2 384

Messy

By Anonymous - 11/06/2025 00:00 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I was playfully walking back to my car with my girlfriend. My door was unlocked. I then noticed my car had stuff scattered inside. A bum had just robbed and ransacked my car. FML

agreeclassic 379

vote type 1 118

By Danielle - 06/06/2011 19:00 - United States

Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML

agreeclassic 55 828

vote type 1 4 077

Big_Red_138 3

Monday 6 June 2011 15:50

Get him back, steal his Viagra. Watch him freak out because of limp dick...just an idea.

lovinit5683 0

Monday 6 June 2011 15:47

Okay that is funny but wrong. You can always get him back though.

Comments

gsxxerr 4

Monday 6 June 2011 21:35

holy shit

xXCODGODXx 11

Monday 6 June 2011 21:45

haha ur a gullible human being

omg_a_BALLOON 0

Monday 6 June 2011 21:57

YDI for having a PS3

JokerJohn7 0

Monday 6 June 2011 22:29

awesome dad .

fatalblue06 0

Monday 6 June 2011 23:11

get him back one day!

kaldnsngdjs 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 0:19

thats hilarious

runepop 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 2:46

LOL

frescheina 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 4:07

HA!! your dad sounds cool as ****

funnyfmfl 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 4:36

omfg that wood suck

nananabatmannnn 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 8:48

I am significantly stupider for have reading that comment. **would

Dodgerfan_3 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 5:34

that's not funny........THAT'S HILARIOUS.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my mom dropped me off at a friend's house. Upon leaving, my friend's mom said how much I looked like my mother. My mother then replied, "That's funny, she was adopted." This was the first I'd heard of this. FML

agreeclassic 2 395

vote type 1 151

Today, I was complimented by my guests about the great of service I was giving them. They then left me a $2 tip on a $50 tab. FML

agreeclassic 10 364

vote type 1 1 232

Today, I found out that I accidentally returned a customer her $147 check she had written out to pay for her groceries and receive cash back. The lady got free groceries and money, and I'm now losing my job. FML

agreeclassic 1 289

vote type 1 705

Today, my boyfriend of almost six years asked me to move in with him. I assumed he meant that he was finally moving out of his parents' house and had found a place for us to live. No, it turns out he means he wants me to move in with him at his parents' place. FML

agreeclassic 36 904

vote type 1 5 899

Today, I set up an office laptop remotely from home. My own laptop screen sat next to that laptop screen. I wanted to wank so opened some porn on my own screen. Then my boss called and said, "There's smut playing on this laptop." Wrong screen, and my work PC was in console mode, so people had gathered to watch. FML

agreeclassic 93

vote type 1 1 072

Today, my mom screamed in my face that if she could go back in time, she’d rather have put up with the 3-minute pain of being fucked in the ass like her boyfriend wanted, because then she wouldn’t have had 13 years of pain raising me. FML

agreeclassic 3 002

vote type 1 349

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Thanks for all your help

Help yourself

Messy

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