Miscellaneous: Today, I started a fight at a lesbian bar and lost. I'm a man.... - FML

By Mofisto - 15/02/2009 10:43 - United States

Today, I started a fight at a lesbian bar and lost. I'm a man. FML

agreeclassic 17 255

vote type 1 89 035

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By Anonymous - 16/04/2009 00:13 - United States

Today, I had dinner with the girl I thought I would end up marrying. Everything was going well and after I had paid the bill, she said she was a lesbian. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, she challenged me to see who could hook up with a straight girl first. I lost. FML

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Today, after cutting my hair and shaving, I had girls hitting on me for the first time ever! Too bad they thought I was a butch lesbian, not a man. FML

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By Anonymous - 05/09/2015 04:58 - United States - Latrobe

Today, for the first time in my life, a girl hit on me. Specifically, a lesbian who thought I was a girl. FML

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By Jeff - 25/08/2009 17:09 - United States

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By Anonymous - 24/10/2012 10:51 - Australia - Croydon

Today, I went to the bar I've always gone to after work for the past 12 years. On arrival, I got banned for life, punched in the nose and thrown out. The barmaid comes out and says, "Sorry, wrong guy." FML

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By John - 30/06/2012 05:08 - United States - Watertown

Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML

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By Anonymous - 19/10/2022 22:00

Today, I got beat up at the bar. Why? I politely rejected a guy's sexual advances, so he turned to physical intimidation. I'm a soft-spoken 5'6 straight male. I've been ghosted by every woman I've talked to in the past two years. The only attention I've gotten is from men who can't take no for an answer. FML

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By Anonymous - 27/09/2009 04:10 - Canada

Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML

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By Noname - 18/03/2009 01:24 - United States

Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

Arbosis 0

Monday 16 February 2009 5:08

wtf why where you in a lesbian bar?

that_one_guy 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 15:54

I bet he was doing the highly credited and validated attack plan of "scoping out for bis." Of course I'm kidding about highly credited and validated bit but never the less. And I wouldn't worry to much about you loosing the fight, unless some mates saw it happen, some of those women can be pretty fierce.

Comments

Amkii 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 12:38

What kind of fight was it? lol

cassdede 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 23:17

the questionbis why were u at a lesbian barr??

zooba22 0

Sunday 4 April 2010 13:40

what kind of a so called 'man' picks fights with girls?

xshadyshadow 0

Thursday 13 May 2010 2:56

I was thinking the same thing. O.O Haha for you OP

baxeh 29

Friday 31 January 2014 20:28

It was a fist fight

suyci 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 12:56

Too many negative votes, comment buried

Show the comment

SparkleyTurtle 4

Saturday 16 June 2012 2:48

All that jicama makes them nice and strong!

that_one_guy 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 15:54

I bet he was doing the highly credited and validated attack plan of "scoping out for bis." Of course I'm kidding about highly credited and validated bit but never the less. And I wouldn't worry to much about you loosing the fight, unless some mates saw it happen, some of those women can be pretty fierce.

MeleMallory 0

Thursday 15 September 2011 12:40

Yeah, if a bi girl is at a lesbian bar, she probably doesn't want to go home with a guy.

bobdole 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 18:32

i like turtles

thirdbase1733 0

Wednesday 3 March 2010 5:11

no...

ritchgirl1 0

Tuesday 1 February 2011 18:11

hahhaahah! priceless!

ermkrmr 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 7:53

turtles are even better if they're AWKWARD

zeldagirl77 7

Wednesday 19 February 2014 1:42

I like trains.

moxy_fml 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 18:54

Wow man that's brutal! wrestlers are wrestlers, no matter the gender, I guess.

Mbpiratedude 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 20:36

You hit a girl? Ahhhhhhhhhahahaha. Hope you got a good sock in before you went down.

aussie_gemini 5

Wednesday 23 March 2011 15:20

lmao this cracked me up! I'm surprised a bunch of feminists didn't jump on you for this tho haha

Imdead 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:17

You're worthless.

alwaysalady 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:54

When you're picking fights with lesbians, that's a neon sign you've had one too many.

Switch_fml 0

Sunday 15 February 2009 22:56

> I'm a man So are they.

ZING_MASTER 0

Monday 16 February 2009 0:28

Yeah, I kicked your ass. You know it.

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Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I returned home from college. I found out that my dad ran over my cat months ago and tried to cover it up by having her stuffed. I found it "her" on my bed when I got home. They think that it's sweet that they stuffed the cat they killed. FML

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Today, I offered my seat to an elderly lady on the subway. She quietly refused. Minutes later on a sharp turn, she almost fell down on two people. As I was clearly the youngest in the disability seating section, everyone on the train turned and glared at me. FML

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Today, being Valentine's Day, I went all out for my wife with flowers, a candlelit dinner, and tickets to a broadway show. The flowers arrived dead, the dinner sucked, and my wife hated the show. Afterwards, I tried to be intimate, but apparently I smelled like a shart trapped in a pant leg. FML

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Today, I went to the gym. Once in the changing room, I realized I'd left my headphones at home. I had to work out without any music, so I spent the next 90 minutes being reminded how loud and obnoxious some gym-goers can be. FML

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Today, my mom accused me of being pregnant. She wouldn't believe me when I told her I'm a virgin, and she challenged me to take a pregnancy test. It came back with a false positive. FML

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Today, I was walking down the sidewalk and heard a little girl ask her dad why I had blue hair. He said, "Sometimes drugs will make people do stupid things." FML

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