Today, I saw a girl wearing the same shirt as me and I wanted...

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By hannah - 21/06/2018 19:20

Today, I saw a girl wearing the same shirt as me and I wanted to high five her. I guess she didn’t have quite the same idea I have, considering I’m now in the ER with a broken and bloodied face. FML

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vote type 1 23

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user53658 15

Wednesday 27 June 2018 10:04

I don't understand. Did you fell, did she punched you, what happened?

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user53658 15

Wednesday 27 June 2018 10:04

I don't understand. Did you fell, did she punched you, what happened?

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

agreeclassic 41 776

vote type 1 20 708

Today, my coworker brought chocolate muffins to work for everyone. This would have been really nice if they hadn't tasted like rotten blueberry muffins spray-painted brown. I reflexively gagged after taking a bite and coughed up a brown mush in front of her. FML

agreeclassic 2 534

vote type 1 235

Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML

agreeclassic 59 273

vote type 1 13 309

Today, at work, I heard a child whisper, "Mom, why do that woman's ears look like that?" The mom replied, "Because she's not smart enough for a good job." I have large plug ears and a degree in mechanical engineering. I waitress because no engineering firm will hire me. FML

agreeclassic 4 438

vote type 1 2 493

Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7 a.m. FML

agreeclassic 37 214

vote type 1 2 774

Today, my older, pill-addicted brother, came over to visit with me. After he left, I realized all my Vicodin was gone. I got my wisdom teeth removed two hours ago. FML

agreeclassic 1 098

vote type 1 251