Animals: Today, I killed a pigeon. It choked to death on a piece of bread... - FML

By bouda - 15/05/2011 18:19 - France

Today, I killed a pigeon. It choked to death on a piece of bread I threw its way. FML

agreeclassic 41 079

vote type 1 7 562

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Anonymous - 24/06/2013 16:41 - Belgium

Today, I was feeding some ducks. One of them choked to death on the old bread. FML

agreeclassic 52 731

vote type 1 15 308

By anonymous - 20/08/2009 06:22 - United States

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

agreeclassic 21 525

vote type 1 49 985

By fencernick - 22/04/2009 10:40 - United States

Today, I was eating a hamburger on the street when a pigeon came down to take a bite. I ran and got 30 birds or so chasing me. My legs were burning, half of my burger was gone, and an entire office building was laughing at me. FML

agreeclassic 57 741

vote type 1 9 467

Tippi Hedren strikes back

By B_and_W - 21/11/2013 11:35 - France

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

agreeclassic 67 040

vote type 1 4 952

Tasty

By Anonymous - 09/07/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I went to the supermarket and picked up some groceries, along with what I thought was a bag of chips. I ripped it open in the car and realized it was a bag of birdseed. As I spat out the birdseed through the car's open window and tried to clean the mess, a pigeon flew into my car and attacked me. FML

agreeclassic 291

vote type 1 889

By nomorepetbird - 06/01/2010 03:30 - United States

Today, my pet bird died. He had caught some illness and had been extremely sick for the past few days. He didn't die from the illness though. My dog ate him. FML

agreeclassic 31 103

vote type 1 3 874

You're welcome

By Melanie - 07/11/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I felt like surprising my coworkers by bringing donuts. Feeling generous, I got a dozen from the most reputable bakery in town. On my way to the office, I tripped, and the box flew open, scattering donuts everywhere. A group of pigeons swooped in and devoured them before I could recover. I spent $30 on pigeon breakfast. FML

agreeclassic 410

vote type 1 142

By Anonymous - 14/04/2009 14:07 - United States

Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML

agreeclassic 57 549

vote type 1 19 915

By craphanded - 19/07/2011 17:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML

agreeclassic 32 811

vote type 1 9 206

By Ketchup - 22/06/2009 06:06 - United States

Today, my brother and I found a little bird that couldn't fly. While trying to convince my mom that it couldn't fly so we could keep it, I lightly tossed it in the air and it landed a few feet in front of me. Then my cat grabbed it and ate it. FML

agreeclassic 22 798

vote type 1 49 916

Next

TOP COMMENTS

spartans916 1

Monday 16 May 2011 0:00

poor guy. it's not ur fault tho :(

anakaren_831 1

Monday 16 May 2011 0:02

poor pigeon. **** the pigeon's life.

Comments

Reallyjerkman11 0

Monday 16 May 2011 4:53

YOU PIGEON KILLER!!!!!!!!

tonea 0

Monday 16 May 2011 4:56

That's ****** up..but very funny!!!!

darkmis1 17

Monday 16 May 2011 5:23

Why didn't you try to save him?

sheethapins 13

Monday 16 May 2011 5:26

Pigeon pie.

weird_little_kid 0

Monday 16 May 2011 5:31

hahahahhahahaha I just died when I read this!!!! hahahahaha

bigchango 0

Monday 16 May 2011 5:48

murder!!!

Ray_of_midnight 22

Monday 16 May 2011 6:00

I'm sure Tom Lehrer approves.

GreatBodoh 1

Monday 16 May 2011 6:10

Now that's an EPIC proportion

jess6blondie9 2

Monday 16 May 2011 6:57

Woah. That's mean.

amuck 0

Monday 16 May 2011 7:00

shit happens, there's too many pigeons anyways especially in big cities... go feed some more... get them nice and fat so the homeless can make some pigeon stew with a good amount of meat in it

4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, my boyfriend invited me over, so I went, not thinking anything of it. To my surprise, he broke up with me. I was pretty upset, and as I was leaving his mom handed me a box. When I got home, I opened it. His mom had baked me a break-up cake. FML

agreeclassic 58 476

vote type 1 3 822

Today, I placed sticky mouse traps in my bedroom. it's now 12:05 a.m. and I've successfully caught a mouse. Too bad I'm scared of them and my husband is passed out asleep. I now get to listen to a mouse squeak all night and have to be up in 4 hours. FML

agreeclassic 10 918

vote type 1 6 571

Today, I got a call from my grandmother saying she locked her keys in the car and I needed to bring her the spares. After an hour bus ride, involving me missing my stop and getting temporarily lost, I arrived and handed her the keys. I brought the wrong ones. FML

agreeclassic 17 569

vote type 1 31 539

Today, I crouched in front of my closet, lost my balance, and broke my thumb trying to steady myself. I'm an artist, and can't work now. I should probably lose some weight. FML

agreeclassic 752

vote type 1 298

Today, I got told that I have a dainty sneeze. It was the closest thing I've had to a compliment I've had in months. FML

agreeclassic 1 520

vote type 1 162

Today, I bought an $80, "invincible" phone case. One test drop later, my phone had turned into an expensive paperweight. FML

agreeclassic 10 873

vote type 1 35 012