Health: Today, I had a long conversation with my fiancé about how smoking...

By Anonymous - 02/03/2012 15:54 - United States

Today, I had a long conversation with my fiancé about how smoking menthol cigarettes is not a substitute for brushing your teeth. He still isn't convinced. FML

agreeclassic 28 341

vote type 1 3 732

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By Dat Stanky Mouf - 16/03/2013 21:52 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML

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By bananayellowteeth - 03/05/2009 08:37 - United States

Today, I went to the dentist. After drilling my teeth for what seemed like hours, he gave me a long speech about how if I continue to smoke, the yellowing of my teeth won't be the only problem. I don't smoke. I never have. FML

agreeclassic 52 870

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He's probably right

By Anonymous - 25/05/2019 00:01

Today, I found out that my boyfriend thinks brushing his teeth is unnecessary, because, "the world is going to end because of climate change anyway." FML

agreeclassic 1 946

vote type 1 215

By Brittany - 18/06/2012 14:57 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML

agreeclassic 12 926

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Nice theory

By Anonymous - 04/09/2015 14:54 - Portugal - Alhandra

Today, my boyfriend thinks he's discovered a big conspiracy by dentists to sell toothpaste. He's arguing that nobody needs to brush their teeth, ever, because all the "new plaque" from food will dissolve the "old plaque", and the only thing he needs to use is breath spray. FML

agreeclassic 25 558

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Yellow

By Anonymous - 25/04/2021 11:01

Today, a friend of mine has stopped brushing his teeth, because, "animals don’t brush their teeth either." You know what else animals don’t do? Smoke a pack of Marlboros a day. FML

agreeclassic 1 073

vote type 1 98

Worst teeth in the game

By Anonymous - 23/09/2021 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the dentist and she told me, "If you don't stop smoking, yellow teeth aren't the only thing you'll have to worry about." I don't even smoke. FML

agreeclassic 992

vote type 1 127

By Amelia - 23/06/2019 00:16

Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML

agreeclassic 1 698

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By disgustedgf - 28/06/2011 07:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he stopped brushing his teeth two days after we started dating. Tomorrow is our 2 year anniversary. FML

agreeclassic 47 953

vote type 1 8 757

Teeth gang!

By pridekills - 19/08/2012 04:19 - United States - Mulberry

Today, my coworker told me I should stop smoking cigarettes because it makes my breath "smell like shit" and makes my teeth look as yellow as corn. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. FML

agreeclassic 29 202

vote type 1 9 023

FreakinChaps 0

Friday 2 March 2012 18:54

I can't even imagine what kissing him would be like.

Redoxx_fml 22

Friday 2 March 2012 19:02

And vodka is a substitute for mouthwash

Comments

badactor009 0

Tuesday 6 March 2012 0:53

Well, any woman that puts up with a nasty pig is also a (you complete the sentence).

Twinb228 4

Tuesday 6 March 2012 17:16

Dumb ass

courtney7191 0

Thursday 8 March 2012 15:16

ewwwww!

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Today, my girlfriend contacted me. She said she'd thought over her feelings over our temporary break in the relationship, and she wanted to try again. Being my stupid, self-loathing self, I asked her so many questions on if she was sure or not that she went back into doubt and revoked the offer. FML

agreeclassic 8 553

vote type 1 11 538

Today, I woke up at 6:00 am to the sound of somebody laying on their horn outside my apartment. I ran outside to yell at them only to find out it was my car. The horn was shortcircuting. All my neighbors stood on their porch laughing as I repeatedly punched my steering wheel to make it stop. FML

agreeclassic 29 395

vote type 1 4 171

Today, I arrived at the beach for a week's vacation. I walk on the beach only to find they are "rebuilding" it. They have heavy machinery all over the place, they work 24/7, and this only happens every 15 years. Glad I picked this week. FML

agreeclassic 30 064

vote type 1 3 730

Today, I was expecting a package from Amazon, so when the doorbell rang I rushed out in my pajamas. It wasn't the delivery guy. It was my ex and her new boyfriend, here to drop off some of my old stuff. I'd answered the door wearing an anime onesie. FML

agreeclassic 210

vote type 1 541

Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML

agreeclassic 31 784

vote type 1 2 940

Today, my supervisor at work was talking about suicide prevention and how to recognize the signs of distress in coworkers. I realized that I exhibit almost all of those signs. FML

agreeclassic 1 147

vote type 1 119