Intimacy: Today, I came home to my mentally unhinged roommate jacking off...

By Anonymous - 08/12/2015 00:40 - United States - Portland

Today, I came home to my mentally unhinged roommate jacking off to a frozen TV frame of Peggy Hill from King of the Hill. When he saw me, he threw an ash tray at me and told me to get out. FML

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vote type 1 2 208

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Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML

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Today, I was watching our home security cameras from work when I saw my husband get home and grab a beer. I activated the camera microphone and told him to put it back and fold the laundry. He flipped off the camera, chugged the beer, and started jacking off on the living room sofa. FML

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lexiieeex3 32

Tuesday 8 December 2015 12:01

I read this too quickly and thought you said that you walked in on your roommate jacking off to Frozen. As bizarre as it is, I found great relief in reading the entirety of the FML.