Love: Today, I came home in tears over finding out my boyfriend has... - FML

By immaturity all around - 31/03/2013 17:55 - United States

Today, I came home in tears over finding out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. I told my seemingly sympathetic dad everything. His advice was to lure them both to our house with the promise of a three-way, after which he'd "kill the shit" out of them. Real mature, dad. FML

agreeclassic 39 781

vote type 1 6 988

End-of-year festivities: New Year's Eve fun and frolics
End the year on a high note with anecdotes where every New Year's Eve firecracker is synonymous with laughter! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Pissed - 21/09/2012 23:20 - United States - Newton Center

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. My dad noticed my depression and got me to tell him what was wrong. I told him everything, and trusting him to have an intelligent suggestion, I asked him what I should do. He shrugged and said, "Fuck, sue him, I dunno." FML

agreeclassic 24 583

vote type 1 2 894

By bastard magnet - 02/10/2011 22:14 - United States

Today, I came home crying after my boyfriend dumped me for another girl. My dad told me to come tell him what was wrong. I sat down and let it all out, after which he looked up from his book, into my eyes, and gave me his loving advice: "Just cry about it and move on to another bastard." FML

agreeclassic 30 110

vote type 1 7 965

By heartbroken - 14/07/2012 01:41 - Canada - Brantford

Today, I came home in tears after my boyfriend admitted to cheating on me. My dad told me to sit down and tell him everything. He's pretty eccentric, so I wasn't fazed when he put on a pair of sunglasses. When I stopped talking, I noticed his mouth was slightly agape and he was snoring. FML

agreeclassic 30 658

vote type 1 2 831

This is fine

By Anonymous - 07/08/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML

agreeclassic 436

vote type 1 104

By Anonymous - 04/01/2014 23:13 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

agreeclassic 49 718

vote type 1 5 703

By Random - 25/02/2016 22:09 - United States - Tuskegee

Today, my dad walked into my school and joked around saying that he's going to shoot my boyfriend. We all laughed. Except my boyfriend. He was sobbing in a corner. FML

agreeclassic 19 278

vote type 1 4 528

Freaked

By Anonymous - 12/06/2023 15:00

Today, my dad joked he’d have to fight my boyfriend to find out if he’s worthy. My boyfriend grew up abused by his dad and older brothers, and has a powerful instinct to fight back. My dad is now out cold on the floor and my boyfriend is in the corner rocking back and forth and crying. FML

agreeclassic 1 289

vote type 1 177

By quit fucking up my life - 23/11/2013 01:08 - United States - Kenai

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML

agreeclassic 48 668

vote type 1 4 927

By -_- - 14/06/2014 03:56 - Australia - Elwood

Today, I was confiding in my dad over the phone, after I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. After I hung up and went online, I noticed he'd been live-blogging the whole call on Facebook and commenting that he was considering suicide to escape the boredom. FML

agreeclassic 52 548

vote type 1 4 981

Great, just great

By Norwegian - 02/06/2012 16:55 - Norway

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML

agreeclassic 29 090

vote type 1 7 496

Next

TOP COMMENTS

thefmlinator 10

Monday 1 April 2013 3:18

I'd do what he says

tabletoplady 11

Monday 1 April 2013 3:20

Your dad is my hero.

Comments

VancouverGuy89 9

Tuesday 2 April 2013 2:11

Your dads a good dad I would suggest the same

onehundredacres 2

Tuesday 2 April 2013 2:11

YOUR DAD IS AWESOME

StephC720 22

Tuesday 2 April 2013 2:32

I like your dad's idea!

ekki8975 3

Tuesday 2 April 2013 3:18

Well... he'll kill them after he get some.

brat0064 17

Tuesday 2 April 2013 3:19

I like the way your dad thinks

JTHomer 13

Tuesday 2 April 2013 3:26

Your father is a beautiful human being.

rissburns 9

Tuesday 2 April 2013 6:33

He cares!

ReepingHavoc 13

Tuesday 2 April 2013 9:31

he's a man with a plan. go for it!

lifestory2 5

Tuesday 2 April 2013 16:20

Sounds like a good dad to me!

fizzy_flow 4

Tuesday 2 April 2013 16:32

dad sounds like a legend

9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when he asked if it was okay to finish on my back. Not only did he do that but he also got it on my neck, the side of my face, and my hair which I'd just gotten done at the salon for almost $200 and can't wash for 2 days. FML.

agreeclassic 2 164

vote type 1 2 191

Today, my sister teased me about being a mistake baby. When I told my mom what my sister said, her response was "I still love you anyway". FML

agreeclassic 40 514

vote type 1 3 799

Today, I walked into the bar to meet my Tinder date and sat down next to him at the bar. Without looking up from his phone, his first words to me were, “Piss off fatty, I’m meeting a hot chick tonight.” I guess he didn’t recognise me with my hair done and in a nice dress. FML

agreeclassic 722

vote type 1 218

Today, I found out that I'm being sued for posting on Facebook about a customer service experience with a local company. Even though we have witnesses, the owners of the store claim that we're lying about the whole thing and that we're "malicious". FML

agreeclassic 9 217

vote type 1 720

Today, I decided to quit smoking and put on a nicotine patch. I decided to have one last cigarette and ended up sick at the doctors with nicotine poisoning. FML

agreeclassic 7 675

vote type 1 42 778

Today, I tripped over a ice block frozen to the ground and hit my knee hard on another. I had trouble getting up, so I asked my dad if he could give me a hand. He started clapping and walked away. FML

agreeclassic 28 478

vote type 1 4 206