Work: Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an...

By Anonymous - 19/04/2014 01:19 - Norway - Mo I Rana

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

agreeclassic 46 620

vote type 1 7 475

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Nightmare fuel

By Traumatized - 12/03/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, at my job as a hotel housekeeper, I accidentally entered the room of someone who hadn't left yet. To my horror, the man inside was having a massive heart attack. I just found out he passed away, despite immediate medical intervention. FML

agreeclassic 740

vote type 1 94

By Crap - 12/04/2016 16:48 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching for the toilet paper, I accidently pushed the emergency button. The nursing supervisors broke into the washroom to help. FML

agreeclassic 19 844

vote type 1 2 967

Death Rattle part 2: Electric Boogaloo

By 0h_Boy - 04/03/2020 18:00

Today, at my job in a funeral home, I was transferring a body off a stretcher when it exhaled its last breath. Right into my face. FML

agreeclassic 1 925

vote type 1 172

By janedoe - 12/02/2009 22:21 - United States

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

agreeclassic 91 834

vote type 1 12 756

By no name - 22/06/2013 07:20 - United States - Gaylord

Today, while working at my job at a nursing home, I slipped and fell. It wouldn't be so bad if it was just water. No, one of the residents had just had an "accident". FML

agreeclassic 46 775

vote type 1 3 838

By mrdentist - 02/12/2010 13:20

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

agreeclassic 69 878

vote type 1 5 542

By guy - 30/07/2012 03:24 - United States - Avon Lake

Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML

agreeclassic 39 181

vote type 1 5 816

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 02:24 - United States

Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML

agreeclassic 31 783

vote type 1 2 496

By Anonymous - 03/06/2015 10:15 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML

agreeclassic 33 984

vote type 1 3 123

By aragmir - 18/12/2016 06:10 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, while working at a nursing home, I was alone in the station and figured I could sneak one out. It wound up being very loud, and I could hear the faint snickering of a patient in the next room. Every time he saw me for the rest of the day he would burst out laughing. FML

agreeclassic 5 712

vote type 1 2 884

Welshite 39

Saturday 19 April 2014 16:23

Silent, but deadly.

Thorvald22 17

Saturday 19 April 2014 16:22

Good god man what did you eat?

Comments

SparkyRoxYurSox 16

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:17

Lmfao.. Achievement unlocked, deadly blast from the past.

sinistral 10

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:34

this sounds like ur trying to make everything about you.. attention seeker much?

stickingems 9

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:43

Sorry ! :(

stfudonnie 10

Saturday 19 April 2014 17:58

well there is worse ways to go out

Ben009 13

Saturday 19 April 2014 18:17

The silent assassin

Thaboman1 4

Saturday 19 April 2014 18:55

You deserved it at 666. Just saying...

mannatee 19

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:01

Shouldn't really joke about death

leary96 15

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:03

"I don't subscribe to coincidence" -Hannibal

scottyspot 11

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:05

Leave no witnesses to your super powers of poo.

vlalam 24

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:08

RIP :(

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Today, I randomly bumped into the girl of my dreams, my high school sweetheart whom I lost 15 years ago when my parents decided to emigrate us. I couldn’t help myself, I went up to her hoping the old spark was still there. She was just as sweet now as she was then, just heavily pregnant. FML

agreeclassic 570

vote type 1 189

Today, my best friend who I've known since high school is getting married. I'm supposed to give a toast during the reception about how great the bride and groom are. I've been sleeping with the groom for the past 7 months. FML

agreeclassic 13 310

vote type 1 149 819

Today, I went on a movie date. During the movie, I picked a small zit on my forehead. Afterwards, at dinner, he couldn't seem to keep his eyes off of my face. I thought he was staring lovingly at me. He was actually staring at a large throbbing zit with a trail of blood coming from it. FML

agreeclassic 18 581

vote type 1 65 228

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

agreeclassic 26 244

vote type 1 246 235

Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML

agreeclassic 12 316

vote type 1 37 023

Today, I went to work as a home health-aid, and found out that my client turns his hearing aid off on purpose because he can't stand my voice. FML

agreeclassic 25 565

vote type 1 4 792

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