Work: Today, every time I write the word "analyst," I can't help but...

By Sunny - 18/09/2013 22:59 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, every time I write the word "analyst," I can't help but giggle because it begins with "anal." I'm 24, and studying to be a conflict analyst. FML

agreeclassic 22 526

vote type 1 34 145

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By very analytical - 26/06/2015 19:56 - United States - Ashland

Today, our outgoing boss told us about guy who's replacing him, saying he's very nice but very anal about things. Without thinking, I shrugged and said "Anal's not bad." Now everyone's calling me Anal-Girl. FML

agreeclassic 26 289

vote type 1 8 608

By Muchacha22 - 20/06/2016 17:25 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my work directory was updated to reflect my recent promotion. Due to lack of space, they abbreviated the title. I'm now listed as "Sr Anal". FML

agreeclassic 13 361

vote type 1 1 673

By boytoy - 02/09/2009 21:23 - Canada

Today, I went to my school to take my yearbook picture. I was wearing a shirt that said ANALOG on the front. When I bent in to take the picture, part of my shirt overlapped itself. Now I'm known as the ANAL kid in the yearbook. FML

agreeclassic 44 109

vote type 1 18 950

Some dream…

By Anonymous - 21/04/2021 17:00

Today, I'm a full-time Investment Portfolio Analyst at one of the largest groups. It has been my dream job and I worked my ass off. I'm one of the best analysts there and people like me. Also, I haven't slept properly for 3 months, without a single day off. I'm about to get mentally sick. FML

agreeclassic 874

vote type 1 498

Indoctrinated

By workfordayzz - this FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I realized that because of my construction job, I have spent such a huge amount of time with older, cynical guys that I keep uncontrollably using the phrase "fucking kids these days" regularly like an idiot. I'm 18. FML

agreeclassic 43 608

vote type 1 9 108

Dial back the passion

By David - 16/05/2025 15:00 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, during a job interview on Zoom, I tried to sound passionate and said, “I eat marketing for breakfast.” The interviewer then asked what I have for lunch. I panicked and said, “Analytics… and sometimes interns.” I haven’t heard back yet. FML

agreeclassic 122

vote type 1 500

Close, but no cigar

By RIPcareer - 18/10/2015 19:18 - United States - Ellicott City

Today, after submitting my college application, I noticed that I mistyped "math enthusiast" as "meth enthusiast". FML

agreeclassic 26 072

vote type 1 7 990

By IBS - 06/05/2014 09:11 - China - Shanghai

Today, after finishing a two hour essay exam that will determine the future of my career, I realized I misread the question. FML

agreeclassic 51 213

vote type 1 13 193

I mean…

By Anonymous - 16/12/2020 01:57

Today, I finally noticed that my new coworker, with whom I have to share an office, starts every sentence with, "I mean…", then a pause, then says whatever he has to say. I can't un-notice it now, and it's like hearing nails on a chalkboard. FML

agreeclassic 945

vote type 1 145

By anonymous - 06/07/2016 13:53 - United States

Today, I got a question wrong on an exam. The question started with, "In your opinion..." FML

agreeclassic 14 661

vote type 1 1 998

Subtext 10

Thursday 19 September 2013 9:37

Trust me, you're not the only one.

Ashamed_Sister 60

Thursday 19 September 2013 9:38

I suggest you grow up before starting your career.

Comments

shannon2348 14

Wednesday 22 January 2020 4:07

Wow. You really need to grow up.

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Today, my landlord sold the apartment I’ve been renting for 10 years without telling me. I found this out when the new owners showed up at the door with boxes. FML

agreeclassic 593

vote type 1 63

Today, I had a dictation test. The whole classroom was silent, but I suddenly needed to fart. Not to break the silence, I wanted to fart slowly in the hope it would be silent. It didn't make the fart less obvious, it just made it longer, so that everyone noticed and started laughing. FML

agreeclassic 905

vote type 1 411

Today, I found out the "free" protein bars at my gym are actually for a fundraiser for children's cancer. I've been taking one every day for the past two weeks. FML

agreeclassic 4 519

vote type 1 3 504

Today, my cat kept sneezing all morning so I took her to the vet. $150 later and the vet says she's fine. I get home and the noise starts up again. My automatic air freshener spray sounds just like my cat sneezing. FML

agreeclassic 18 528

vote type 1 52 547

Today, despite filling all the parameters for a model employee and being praised by multiple people over the time I was working, I was fired because a client complained to my manager that I didn't seem to know what I was doing. FML

agreeclassic 1 752

vote type 1 143

Today, my husband and I were lovingly holding hands on the couch. I'm not typically a cuddler, but I went with it… until he sneezed into his hands. This would of been fine, if my hand wasn't still coupled with his. His laugh suggested harmless fun. My drenched hand suggested murder. FML