Love, Sex, Birthday and Relationship advice: Oh look, a big red flag!

Oh look, a big red flag!

By fmlmvlijthen - 29/09/2024 16:00 - Netherlands

Today, the girl I've been seeing for two months and with whom I'm in love with, asked me, whilst she's on holiday celebrating her birthday, whether I would pay for a male escort for her as a birthday gift. FML

agreeclassic 478

vote type 1 155

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Today, since I've been falling for the girl I've been sleeping with for the past couple of months, I decided it was time for us to talk about making things official and exclusive. I was confident she'd feel the same way. Then I found out she's an escort. FML

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By emi - 03/04/2016 17:18 - United States - Oklahoma City

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By thebigguy - 12/08/2017 04:30

Today, as it's been a long time since I've been with a woman, I decided to enlist the services of an escort. Upon my arrival, she looked at me and said, "Honey, we are going to need a bottle of whiskey and an extra $100." FML

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By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 18:01

Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML

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Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML

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By turriblebday - 17/12/2009 15:35 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. My girlfriend took me out to dinner. While at the restaurant, she went to the bathroom. She was then escorted out of the restaurant for having sex in said bathroom. I was sitting at our booth the entire time. FML

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angus 16

Sunday 29 September 2024 20:23

Maybe she’ll pay for a male escort for your birthday too🤷‍♂️😂

Chazzster 29

Sunday 29 September 2024 17:24

Just say no.

Comments

Chazzster 29

Sunday 29 September 2024 17:24

Just say no.

angus 16

Sunday 29 September 2024 20:23

Maybe she’ll pay for a male escort for your birthday too🤷‍♂️😂

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my boyfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. He got on top and started kissing my ear when a warm liquid went down my neck. My boyfriend had a gushing nosebleed, which went threw the pillowcase and the pillow. I got cockblocked by a nosebleed. FML

agreeclassic 1 144

vote type 1 178

Today, my long term ex, who broke up with me over a year ago and shattered my heart, seduced me (which wasn't hard, as he knew I still had feelings for him) and as he pulled out after the couple of minutes of what he called sex, he used the line, "There we go, that's your freebie." FML

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Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

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Today, we decided to go to an aquarium for a little family get-away. At the end was a shark viewing deck, and I leaned over the rails to get a better look. How did I find out that my glasses needed to be adjusted? They fell off and sunk right to the bottom of the shark-infested waters. FML

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Today, I pulled a muscle in my face. Chewing gum. For the second time. FML

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Today, it's the 6th day that we have been snowed in. We haven't left the house, because we can't. I've done at least 30 hours of Legos. FML

agreeclassic 7 039

vote type 1 663